I'm not turning around.
I'm not gonna go down.
I'm not living a lie.
I'm not going to die.
I'm not telling you shit.
I'm not taking a hit
for your grounds anymore.
I won't be ignored.
I'm not shaking this off.
I'm not going to cough
in this vapor of lies.
I see the look in your eyes
and I know who you are.
I'm not hiding my scars.
I'm not doing anything
for you. I don't know why
you bit into a lie
that you made up yourself.
I'm not running like Hell.
I'm not fighting back tears.
I'm not downing some beers.
I'm not smoking a joint.
It wouldn't prove my point
that I'm not what you think.
I'm not seeing a shrink.
I'm not running from love.
I think I've had enough
of trying to defend
for all that you intend.
I'm not gonna slow down.
I'm not turning around.
I'm not doing this again.
I'm not losing my friend.
I'm not hitting the mark.
I'm not going to bark.
I'm not going to howl.
But I will not allow
anything else like this.
I'm not shaking my fist.
I'm just telling you now
how the rules are set now.
Don't pretend to be gone
although you know it's wrong.
It's not something you do
when we care about you...
Get the hell out of my head.
Cause you're already dead.
I'm not turning this around.
You're not beating me down.
I can't breathe anymore.
Laying flat on the floor,
My heart no longer beats.
It's shut down from defeat.
Although it doesn't ache,
somehow, it can still break.
I know this cause I can't feel...
Emotion distortion in me,
You're not setting me free
by running away
It's just another thing in my way...
And now that I have the key,
I think of how you left me.
So I run from my home
just to leave you alone
just so you know how I feel
so you know this pain's real
and I curse each day
that you run away.
and I hate myself
I'm so sick of myself!
For not throwing you out of my life sooner...
Now I wanna know what you've got.
Since you portray what you're not!
I'm not doing this again!
You go ahead and pretend
that the past cannot break,
but it's starting to shake
and pretty soon I swear
This bond is going to tear...
Author notes
I wrote this one not only for a dear friend that has abandoned me, but a mother who has decided to shun me.
Any better? Any worse?
Comments
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It hurts me to see you feel this way love.
But you know, no matter how ever many people abandon you, there's always one person who won't, and that's me.
I love you. ^-^
Oh yeah, and you know, this one would make a good song, but a harder-rock one, if you know what I mean.
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