i fed my feelings
with you
and starved
my thoughts
of tomorrow
are bland
and unfulfilling
the sun dries my eyes
and the wind
blows through me
a bitter...
scarecrow
Author notes
.
In a list
A contest entry
- Short pieces - Prewrites Allowed. Bring the good stuff! by Amunet Wolfbane.
1000 points, ended April 1, 2008, 58 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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I can feel dry wind as I read this, the imagery is real. Wonderful
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very evocative and well-written. only one criticism: the reference to the scarecrow, given the tone of the piece, sounds very much like TS Eliot; since he is so well known, and used the scarecrow image in 'The Hollow Men,' it would be more original to use another image. in fact, i think it would be great if you simply removed "a bitter.../scarecrow" and left it as-is.
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This is marvelous poetry, Richard. I was thinking of a tumbleweed too while reading this.
Wonderful...so glad I read this. It deserves to be in the spotlight.
~ Nicolette
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I see why this won gold...So profound...You amaze me in so few words!
Sigh~
Lynda
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That last stanza just nailed it, Richard. Damn, Sweetie. I'm happy someone spotlighted it on the front page for ya or I'd have missed it. I'm gone too much & my favorites all post so much, so often, it's easy to miss a gem among the jewels. Congrats on your golden chalice, Scribe. I can think of no one that deserves 'em more.
Wanderer
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The emotion of this just smacks you in the face from second one and you can feel it all the way to the core of your being as you read this beautiful piece. Thank you for sharing your words with me and best wishes to in all of your endeavors. Keep that quill dipped in ink and ever ready for use dear poet.
♥ Touchof1der -
This was my favorite part;
"i fed my feelings
with you
and starved
my thoughts"
kathleen
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Oh, can't clap again... lol. Damn. Well, I'm standing and whistlin
hon.
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well written kind of a mystery though?
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I agree...
This is phenomenal! I can easily see why this was spotlighted. Obviously someone knows an awesome poet when they read them
I don't think I can add to the comments below, just agree with them. Rock on Baby! Peace, Gypsy
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I remembered this from before, and still feel the starkness, the husk of the person blowing with the sad sounds of the keeper of the barren field. Well-deserved gold.
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"A bitter...scarecrow." What a wonderful metaphor for a person emptied and dejected by the vagaries of love.
Excellent piece.
Bill
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Not in Oz Anymore
The scarecrow is composed of the rejected materials of man, impaled ala Vlad, stuck in the middle of nowhere to hang limp and lifeless....yeah, great metaphor for LOVE!!! Loved it. Your friend, the Cowardly Lion.
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WOW! What a powerful message in so few lines. Amazing. It left me with a haunting image, and is a poem I will recall easily from time to time. Well done!
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love it!
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just one word...amazing!!!!
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This is phenomenal and I mean that. That first stanza just reaches out and grabs you. I often believe when we care for others we try so hard to heal and help them that we do indeed starve to death trying to allow them to live. Then we are left with nothing, all we have sucked into their abyss as we continue to suck their dismal reality from them. They turn out great and we...we just lay naked in their waste as they kick us aside. I am literally chilled to the bone falling into this piece of poetry. The image in my mind is pounding like it wants out to devour me. Freakin awesome poem.
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Amazingly crisp and clear, drenched in sorrow yet a perfect description of the emptiness of lost dreams. Bravo.
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Very nicely written my friend, an excellent take on the given prompt, best of luck to you...Scott
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Wow I really loved this take on my prompt Thank you for entering my contest
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This is very excellent. I love the vision of the dead, starving and bitter scarecrow. Very powerful poem.
Well done poet! - jo
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The prompt is up
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