She turned 18 no one really noticed
her best friend was now a drug addict
Her mother frail and far away
she started to remember her fathers abuse
the flashbacks were horrid
she would go into seizures
remembering the rape and torture
the pain was overwhelming
day after day
no one understood
the cutting only did so much
it didn't numb her like it used to
just deeper wounds
her father wouldn't leave her head
she could not get his voice
out of her ears
she thought she was going crazy
no one understood
she would often wonder
if anyone would miss her
if anyone would even notice
that she was gone
she just wanted some relief
something, anything
to ease the constant pain
the pain in her mind
no one understood
Author notes
gigolo
gaiascully
this is about how I was feeling before I attempted suicide a few years ago. I was having horrid flashbacks, all my friends left, I didn't really have anyone to go to, my mom was cutting as well and my life was just pain, I did not think I could take anymore at that point.
A contest entry
- Life Sucks (rounds contest) by SoftlyScreaming.
600 points, ended July 12, 2007, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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"her father wouldn't leave her head
she could not get his voice"
I know that feelings. Wanting to just loose the memories, but can't. The ghost of ones past just seem to haunt you.
The repetition of the title is also really effectful.
I can't believe your mother is/was a cutter too. Poor you. Keep hope!
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BRAVO
This poem is amazing and I am so glad that you survived to write it! My favorite part is:
she would often wonder
if anyone would miss her
if anyone would even notice
that she was gone
because I can relate to it the most, and I think many teenagers can...
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this is a very good and horribly sad poem i hope you are feeling bettr now good job keep it up
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sorry bout that, my comp was all screwy and I accedently posted it before it was done, I deleted that one because this was the real finished product, so I take it that I did okay?
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oh, okay... this poem.. i commented on the other one not knowing that this one is the same thing, just a changed title.. okay.. whoopsie thank you for following directions then
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