Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Sonnet LVII

"Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?
I have no precious time at all to spend,
Nor services to do, till you require..." (Shakespeare, Sonnet LVII)

I listen with all my concentration
to do what you require from my love.
Searching, intent on an explanation.
Forever on call, I am like your glove.
I fit you so that even when I'm gone
I am not so absent as to miss you.
If you feel fit to treat me as a pawn,
Things I wouldn't do for you, are so few.
I leave your affairs, only you are mine.
I think of nothing but your contentment.
I think of nothing if, when you are gone.
I am not your only entertainment,
only to be used between dusk and dawn.
But since I am your slave, I wait, in vain.
It is now daylight, you shan't say my name.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • PainfulPleasures
    May 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This works, very much like the quote start, and the poem following fits it quite well. I actually avoided reading this at first, normally I dislike quotes, but I can relate to parts of this pretty well, and it's put together uber well, so in the end, I'm very glad that I read it, and you get applause. :3


  • HighlandsGirl
    May 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "I fit you so that even when I'm gone I am not so absent as to miss you"...brilliant line, Brian and nice to see you again. I also liked "I leave your affairs, only you are mine." Congratulations on the bronze! ~Elizabeth


  • Gwenevere
    May 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Congratulations on the Bronze.How often we fall into the trap of being owned and yet true love is not like that.It is to be free spirit and to be with a person because you want to be not because they say so.I hope you find freedom in love, Ros