Helter Skelter
As a child I rode a fair ground Helter Skelter
I remember sitting screaming on a little mat
My parents were waiting at the end to greet me
So glad I was safe and thanking God for that
I’m now old, but still ride that Helter Skelter
As nightly it occurs so often in my dreams
I do not now have the comfort of my parents
Anxious at the bottom listening to my screams
In my dreams I have no hidden knowledge
Of what or who will be waiting there for me
My subconscious has created a mystery ride
Out of my control, so what will be will be
It’s a spiral of descent that is showing me
All that has gone before in my distant past
The faces of my long departed caring parents
Smile at me but their images do not last
When all of my life has flashed before me
Old friend’s, lover’s, enemies long since dead
Suddenly I arrive at my unknown destination
My Mum and Dad aren’t there to greet me,
It’s the Grim Reaper waiting there instead
A contest entry
- Dreams! by StarIlluminated.
700 points, ended April 5, 2008, 15 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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This is a very clever write quite haunting in fact.i rode those many a time as a child.In fact oddly my son was totally unnerved by one the other day and we had to climb up to get him lol!!!
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wow this is great! I love the detail and the rhyming! This is a great poem thanks for entering!
Illuminated *KT*
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Great Analogy...............
I like the way you write!!! The analogy you have created with your words to descibe your life events and the fears you had and have at your ripe age now. I think all who read will be able to relate quite easy with this profound write! Thanks for sharing this with me today and helping me to dust off the memories of my own that coorelate to this piece!!!~~Toni~~
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Yes. A pefect description of a typical end game dream. It happens in different forms to all of us.
Mine occurs in the office,
with deadlines, completely overwhelmed.
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well done! well written especially strong conparsion of live & dying and good & evil... life is long journey child to adult.. thanks for sharing.
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Very interesting poem you have penned here.... Great job
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This wasn't what I imagined, when I responded to the title and clicked on - but maybe not that far off, after all. The feeling of being out of control, when a child, is only OK when parents are waiting at the end of the ride. You took this on, in a well-written poem, to people the ride with ghosts from your past, as if waiting on the side-lines to welcome you to that final home. Neatly written, and tied back to itself well. The final line is great, reminding all that there is only one end to the ride.
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Helter skelter a life long journey - good composition. Interesting closing line and true for us all. Happy trails
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Stunning
This is a quite stunning piece of poetry. I also like the strong contrast you create with the beginning and end of your poem, the warm emotions evoked by the idea of loving parents is a sharp comparison to death I think, and it works well. The way it describes the kind of fleeting way of life passing and people being lost, or that's how it seems to me, is good. -
Wow, this is dark, huh? I have noticed that things are usually their worst before good things happen, and as to death, well, it happens to us all. Eventually we all pass on. It is best, I feel, to make amends with any and all we may have harmed and just enjoy life as much as possible until we die. I hope this helps, and I wish you the best! - ocerus
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