Tonight the sea is a rebel sea, tonight,
And the curtains of the rain
(The curtains of the brain)
Brushing its pitted surface, all rebel
Where once an echo fell
Splashing on plangent waters.
"Time, like a tyrant, holds earth in subjection",
But not, but not the sea; and an insurrection
Of an alongside-life pierces the white
Facts the cold years have brought us,
Facts the dead years have taught us.
The little ships go out
Under the rain, their kelvins and their diesels
Chugging them on, and the stinging raindrops flout
All prettinesses fit for Sunday easels.
For the ships are working ships.
Their sides bunched fat with brown nets, like the hips
Of a market-woman, they ply
Their trade where the great shoals lie,
And nothing more...
But the sea is a rebel sea,
And slowly, patiently,
The beat of its waves and the rain and the engines blend
Into a without-end-
But-infinite-attenuated-quiver,
An echo (lost, the idle think, forever)
Woken from a time's trance
Into strange resonance,
And the high-prowed ships come in, with their lifted oars,
Weary with gold and wars,
And the long haul over…
This I have seen tonight; let the wise men cover
The mystery in shrouds of learned speech...
They will never touch the truth that the waters teach,
For tonight the sea is a rebel sea, tonight.
Author notes
I do not know whether this really fits your competition, but in 1964, my mother and I were in Shetland, watching the Lerwick fishing fleet go out late one night at around Midsummer, in the "simmer dim" - that strange half-light when in those latitudes the sun dips only just below the horizon - and suddenly, to both of us, it seemed that the 20th-century motor-powered fishing boats going out from the harbour were transformed into Viking hafskips coming towards the shore.
Hence this poem.
A contest entry
- The Sea! by N.W. Clerk.
450 points, ended July 13, 2007, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything that has good rhyme!(pre-writes allowed) by ExpectingMommy18.
650 points, ended October 25, 2007, 73 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Viking Warriors Come Forth! Viking inspired by Salt Therapy.
300 points, ended April 24, 2008, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Contest Miracles, Signs & Wonders by Maatkara #79 Winklings and AP Friends by Lyndon.
3075 points, ended May 23, 2008, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Amazing Summer Imagery!!!.....(clicky!) by faithful-star.
600 points, ended June 9, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 'Phantom Ships at Sea' by Cynthia Gaines.
1200 points, ended August 7, 2008, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Supernatural by Mrs. Serial Killa.
600 points, ended July 29, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Fantasy Element by ArchOblivion.
600 points, ended September 7, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please do not feel obliged to comment - and if you DO comment, then please understand it may be some time before I acknowledge it.
Comments
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I loved it as much as I love hearing about the oceans and the sea in all it's different moods. Bringing it to life is very fantasy oriented, a good read. Thanks for your entry and good luck.
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I Second That Opinion...
Bill is correct, Vera. "Sea-Change" is a visual and mental feast, very beautifully written and deserving of all its previous accolades and awards. Because it does not fit our contest criteria, it wouldn't be fair to the other poets to allow this piece to receive a trophy among the gold, silver, or bronze winning entries. Thank you just the same for entering your poem in our contest, and for sharing your work with all of us!!!
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This is a poem rich in words and is visually stunning
However the contest was to be about ghost ships, haunted by long dead crews.
A smashing poem nevertheless. -
It fits my contest very nicely thank you for your entry this was very nicely written. Great work. Good luck and thanks for entering my contest
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Very, very poetic. Your word choice and visuals are amazing.
Well done
Raker
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Hmm, though this poem does not fit into the topic of my contest, I still have to give you credit for the well done imagery and rhyming! Thank you for sharing this memory inspired poem with me and best of luck!
~Faithful-Star -
That is quite unusual, as if you stood in a different time for a moment. I like the style of the poem very much, with hidden rhymes and striking metaphors, as the hips made of nets. This is so much better than the poems I usually read that I am witless.
Congratulations.
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All six senses active and adept
This is poetry that outlasts the tyrant time, methinks. The quote has a Tolkien flourish. Evocation of a twilight world of landscape and mind is evident.Your words also have a Masefield flavour. Emphasis through stressed repetitive words rolls on like the plangent sea, yet the echoes splash rather than the waves. Lots of figurative manoeuvres knit a fine texture of two worlds melded as one: the viking ships and the fisher boats.
If Hardy can have "salamandrine" you may have "prettinesses"!
I particularly smiled at the hips of a market-woman. I have never thought of a trawler that way before and you have now made it memorable for me.
A memorable poem; a gifted author. Both together add up to excellence.
Lyndon of the Winklings.
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Exemplary!
This is a superbly written poetic rendition of an exceptional sensory and exra sensory experience. Your deft use of language, painting every detail, contrast and simile with goose-bump evoking imagery is masterful; leaving no doubt as to the scene witnessed.
Thoughtfully crafted with skill, care and precision - a literary gourmet's banquet!
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Ok. Now I can see again! I treated myself to this piece read aloud and its majesty undid me...
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I don't know where to start with this. It is very evocative. I love the Northern Isles (I have visited Orkney several times, in midsummer, but not yet Shetland) and I was caught up in the imagery here, and the idea of the rebel sea. Excellent poem. Congratulations on the bronze.
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Absolutely amazing.
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great poem. thank you for entering and good luck with the contest.
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A wonderful poem, I particularly like the the first stanza. Most of the poetry I've been reading of late has been shorter and more succinct...which I do like...but it is nice to read something a bit more fleshed out and very rich in tone. Not very fond of the word 'prettinesses'...it trips me up when I read this aloud. Just a personal preference, though.
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STUNNING WRITING
Stunning writing here. I flowed beautifully-well. The imagery took my breath away. Wonderful emotion within this piece as well. Keep writing.
All the best
Wayne
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this poem flowed along beautifully, my hats off to you. Eddy
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Dear Vera
A person once remarked to me that a small particle of the breath we just drew may well have been that of the exhalation of Jesus Himself.
I feel that when I read this poem, and I think that I'm reading it as many times as you yourself, that if I held a palm-ful of sea water, this water has been around the world a great many times. To beaches and peoples as far as God could see on this earth. Indeed was here when the moon first appeared.
The last verse I would trade my eye-teeth for! Well, not really, got dentures!
All the love,
John USA
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Dear Vera
Love the italics! Exactly the thing.
Saw your notes...you're quite welcome!
I see this poem in a class with "The Wreck of the Hesperus"
But I've not yet got my sea-legs to make such an appraisal!LOL
Your friend,
John-Las Vegas -
Lute sent me.
It has an envoi - is it a named form?
This is my favorite part and definitely remarkable imagery:
Their sides bunched fat with brown nets, like the hips
Of a market-woman, they ply
Their trade where the great shoals lie,
And nothing more...
I don't care much for the parenthesis or ...'s But personal choice those things. I was at an art gallery the other night, the theme was The Angry Sea. There was a watercolor that was called "Ocean in Rainstorm" you captured that very well with your stinging raindrops.
Good luck to you in the contest but who really cares about a cyber trophy when the outcome is good you know it.
Enjoyed, thank you.
Lisa
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Poem!
Marvellous.
And the high-prowed ships come in, with their lifted oars,
Weary with gold and wars,
And the long haul over…
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a rebel sea...
This is a magical work poet! You have captured the feel of the sea and those who go out to wrest a living from her. Some wonderful imagery evoked by some excellent word choices...
Good luck in the contest!
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I am a water lover, and this poem refreshed my spirit. I know the "rebel" a body of water as vast as the sea can become. Your poem is written with such flavor and style. You language usage, astute but I would expect nothing less from you my friend. I do hope you are recovering at a slow but steady pace. I wish you well in this contest. This is surely a work of word-art. The rhyme is stellar.
Much Love ♥
Renee
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This made me want to...........
take a trip to the ocean and walk on the beach at night looking at the beauty of the silvery waves as they each one crest in the moonlight.Your imagery paints a picture of all that goes with the sea, the ships the cold war and even death...there will always be a mystery to the sea and it will always be a rebel of sort I believe!!Thanks for sharing this piece!!!~~Toni~~
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NICE
I am a freak for the sea. This piece is so enriched with satiny vocabulary that flows like a silky river. sweet
POETDONTKNOWIT -
Awesome wreite..this one is a beauty! i honestly like your imagery and thoughts abt it..and the flow of the poem is just hillarious and the words come so meaningful and attractive. I really appreciate it.. the title is a good one too!! Keep up d good work
God bless -
Saline tang and slap of wet wind waves on my cheek. I live by the sea and used to wade deep in shingle whilst 8 months gone with my smallest baby. Silly me; but taught the 'older' two to love a pebble beach in the rain and haar. Just glad I only have to eat the fish and not catch them. This was purest pleasure, Vera. Have three and I'd double the catch if I could x
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One of the best I've read from you to date. Doggone good! Exciting! Inciting! Enticing!
John USA
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This is poem is awe inspiring, captivating from beginning to end. Thank you for entering the contest!
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I enjoyed reading this, your ideas range near and far. I thought of the leathered faces of deep sea fishermen, whose eyes rest on the horizon. They have a relationship with the sea that we can only guess at.
The form is exactly right for the sweep of images.
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