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Your beauty, like that of a rare orchid
Is further enhanced and cannot be hid
By the aura emanating from your soul;
To make you aware of this is my goal.
The hair of your head, curly and bold
Is soft, the colour of finely spun gold
Sparsely streaked with tresses of fire
Of telling you of this I will never tire.
Your eyes are large and shaped well
Hazel in colour and clear as a bell
With flecks of gold flashing at me
Long lashes where they should be.
Your cheeks flushed with a soft glow
Suggesting the light and colour flow
Of a sweet tree ripened Georgia peach
The ecstacy of which most never reach.
Lips the colour of a red delicious apple
That butterflies are tempted to sample
Yet pouty and tender, inviting my kiss
Oh my God, that would be pure bliss.
Yet I could add much more sweetheart
But I can sense, of me you want no part
You already heard this hackneyed line
Before, so I guess I am wasting my time.
Oh! At the other end of the bar I can see
A chick surreptitiously glancing at me
Sure hope I can remember all of line two
Cause she’s a brunette with eyes of blue.
©...by jean ruff
Author notes
Never have any luck picking up girls in a bar.
Written August 21st, 2003
In a list
A contest entry
- Funny, Sad, or Just A Stalker? by ChappitySnap.
350 points, ended April 20, 2004, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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A very sweet poem, very tender right up to the end when the little twist takes you by surprise! A good write.
Sephiroth Hi No Tenshi -
This has got great rhythm and the lines rhyme really well. It's a beautiful topic you talk about, and the little twist at the end is humorous.... Lovely poem. I have to take you to task re: it's better to have loved and lost thna not to have loved at all. I totally disagree, cos if you've never loved and lost you haven't had to experience the pain of heart break. It's easier to cope with the pain of ebing unloved than the pain of being loved and then rejected. XXX
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Wow...this is a new side of you I haven't seen. A little different twist in your writing too. I am pleased to know more of you.
Great write.
Had a great rhythm along with rhyme. The flow was steady...lol
LOve it my friend.
Sam
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Is this about the same girl in your story, first kiss? I could tell by the way you described her eyes, hair, lips and other facial features.
This was definitely an open poem of description. I wish just about everyone knew how beautiful they are. It's nice that you feel you should remind this person of their beauty.
Smae
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As usual your talent for descriptive writes is showing Jean. The last paragraph was very funny and the whole thing was great. I love your sense of humor. Beautiful girl in the picture! Love, Irene
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Another great write. Serious the whole way through and then the last stanza gave me a little laugh.
Sure hope I can remember all of line two
Cause she’s a brunette with eyes of blue.
Those last two lines I thought were great!
I take it this is a picture of your granddaughter. Who ever she is, she is indeed beautiful.
By the way, thank you for your offer of the cd. I will accept it with gratitude. As soon as I get back home, I will send you my address,as I have to get a new mail box and I know I will not have the same number.
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