Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

dusk, in deep review

i look into the sun
and see a thousand shades of blue
when i finally look away.

it's the purple floating image
that will always link myself to you,
and move my heart a little closer to
my hand.

 

 



i'm wondering what kind
of animal i am,

and why i hunt
what has been hunted.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the sun slows,
and as the glowing ring subsides
i recognize the urge to leave

some questions
in eclipse.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • The.Stars.Go.Blue
    August 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Do I know who this is? I think I do, Mister.

    Anyway, I absolutely effing loved this, as I do most of your poetry. And every poem you write has a different twist... you're amazing.


  • natari
    July 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    An abstract write.Again another different side of you.This made me ponder and I love where it took me.
    Love ya Helen


  • Violet Moodswing Greeters member
    July 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    An interesting and multifaceted write. My favorite kind. I like the feel of wondering and the way it allows the reader to get involved in the "questions in eclipse"

    The title ties in well with the ending too. That is always a nice touch.

    Good to have a minute to get by and read your stuff


  • sand drifter
    July 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    maybe subsides isn't the best word. without that word i just feel like you have a perfect poem here and thats the word getting in the way. maybe this is because i use that word a lot too. i think the middle stanza is downright amazing.


  • inked-destiny
    July 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Abstract Beauty

    This poem makes me want to sit down, and really think. It can be related to in many different ways and interpreted very differently.

    I like the imagery used.


  • poetryality silver member
    July 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    There is great substance here, layered between the lines. You say far more than you've written with these words. Sometimes, I too wonder what kind of animal I am. LOL Great musing! I wish you well in the contest.


    Much Love ♥

    Renee


  • layla.
    July 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I like your personification. Good luck.


  • purpledragonfly
    July 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    i'm wondering what kind
    of animal i am,

    and why i hunt
    what has been hunted.

    I love this part!!! Nice to read something from you! Have missed your writes, but see that the break has done you well wonderful ! Betsy


  • Heart Sutra
    July 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I love the last couple of lines.


  • hilly
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    If I dissect this, I am so unimpressed. But something about the product altogether, I love. Intriguing.


  • Phineas Red
    July 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Hot damn, that's nice. I see a long break makes them come back quite strong, Mr. Huska.

1 - 12 of 12