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~ Sands of Time ~

Missing image
with you beside me I am complete
all's now perfect within my world
those lonely thoughts drift away
your sun shine lights my heart
day's break 'til day's dusk
tho' time stands still
our souls join
always
love
dear
always
you are mine
two hearts on fire
love will keep us warm
wrapped in cloud of wonder
rainbow kisses light our world
what ever woes should befall us
with you beside me I am complete
 
with you beside me I am complete
what ever woes should befall us
rainbow kisses light our world
wrapped in cloud of wonder
love will keep us warm
two hearts on fire
you are mine
always
dear
love
always
our souls join
tho' time stands still
day's break 'til day's dusk
your sun shine lights my heart
those lonely thoughts drift away
all's now perfect within my world
with you beside me I am complete



Author notes

In Love.

Words to shapes
'GIVE VOICE TO BOTH OF THEM'

'Double Reverse Nonet'
Each Nonet (Nine lines counting syllables from nine to one per line then one to nine reversed)... can be read on it's own...up or down singularly or as a whole as we have here...also read in reverse to flow well too. I think we have created a monster
Take time as you go..."Like sands through the hour glass..."

(for Bubba's Dad)

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 64 of 64

  • KnightOfTheRose gold member
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. I loved this poem. Love is so amazing, and I loved the way you used the hourglass to show loves progression with time. Simply amazing. Congratulations on the two honorable mentions and the silver trophy you won with this piece. You more then deserved every one of them. Thank you for taking the time to enter. Excellent work and I wish you the best of luck in my contest



    -Steve-


  • Pattiboo silver member
    August 7

    Edit | Reply

    Amazing

    Never seen this kind of poem before but I think it is beautiful. Must look it up and see what I can achieve but could take quite a while the spirit being willing but the brain ?


  • Margaret Denham gold member
    June 17

    Edit | Reply

    WOW!!!!!

    You have a skill in taking a little poem and making it into something graceful and so sublime

    Best of luck in the contest Twinny...from me and from the Dragon Lady

    Love Margaret


  • MichaelSavage gold member
    May 10
    Edit | Reply
    I like the style and effort put in your work
    thank you for entering my contest
    Michael


  • sweet innocence
    April 7
    Edit | Reply
    wow!! I love it!! well penned
    thanks for entering my contest!


  • sweet innocence
    April 4
    Edit | Reply
    WOULD YOU PLZ PUT *In Love* in your AN!
    and thanks!!


  • Mila7
    July 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i love this poem! Its so tender and imaginative

    "all's now perfect within my world"

    this phrase is a bit awkward in the first hourglass but I wouldn't change it because it falls perfectly in the second one.

    "wrapped in cloud of wonder
    rainbow kisses light our world"

    Such a fantastical love, your poem is something sweet and wonderful.

    I love the repetition, it sort of gives it a statement-like charm.

    Very well done!


  • Recluse Writer gold member
    May 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you
    Pleased I could pull one out that you enjoyed.
    Wonderful contest mate. Well wishes with it
    Linda


  • Roaddog Wolf
    May 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is without a doubt an astounding write both in form and in poetry. really good
    thank you for entering my contest and good luck with the judging

  • aaaaaaaa
    April 26, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is a lovely write, and I love how you wrote it in the shape of an hourglass.


  • Ringside
    February 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like the hour glass format and how it can be read in reverse.  Very creative. Great job. Thank you for entering the contest and good luck.


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      February 7, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you Soooo much for the Gold.
      Pleased you enjoyed this one
      Linda


  • dustookie2
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Many words have been said already I only say Very well crafted to you both Good luck in the contest.


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      January 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you
      We are proud of it's invertedness and jealous of it's figure

      Linda


  • DawnBaby
    January 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent!!!

    This is a beauty! Good luck to you sista, sisters are ALWAYS competing. Good luck this one is a great piece. I will need all the luck I can get.

    • Recluse Writer gold member
      January 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Remember your glass is half full!!!
      Sissy
      (hey you know I always loved that American name...can I have it please?????)

      kiss ya feet...anything!!!


  • funpum
    January 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Ooooh clever!

    I like shape poems -this is lovely and the shape means something, the time ticking by etc... I love working on things like this too, but have no time for fun at the mo...


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      January 17, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks Liz
      I really enjoyed working on this one with a great friend and wonderful poet.
      Linda


  • DrunkenRam
    November 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I like how you put the word Love at the Neck. Clever.


  • Angelic Princess21
    November 28, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    great write. good luck in the contest.


  • Melissa Burns
    November 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    *~*~ Thank you very much for entering my little contest! *~*~* I am very excited to see how this one turns out - good luck!


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      November 29, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I wish you well with the contest and thanks for providing another venue for this write.

      Linda


  • passim silver member
    October 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, I salute you my friend. This is a lovely piece of work in both content and shape. Good luck in the contest


  • McRae by nature
    October 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This was an amazing piece, the shape was really clever. Thanks for the entry.

    Carrie


  • Passionate Phoenix
    September 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I love this write, lovely shape as well for it, which draws the reader in to wanting to read it. Lovely title to go with it and I adore the way you have written this. some wonderful imagery. well done xx


  • still.she.waits
    August 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    i love your choice of the hourglass shape, it flows very well


  • faithwhisperer silver member
    August 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I like this! Great idea to make it like hour glass...works very well! Nicely done!


  • Rose-Quartz
    August 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I just want to add some applause for your great poem xx

  • Rose-Quartz
    August 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful !!

    These poems are absolutely beautiful. I am in awe of your talent,because to be able to write in this style is very difficult and you have done it not only with great style but with a lot of beauty also. Your words were so tender and romantic and beautiful. An amazing piece of poetry and writing also. Really well done. All my very best wishes from Rose xx


  • penquinpoet
    August 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Way too much fun as I always say to my kids

    I have to say, and only because you suggested it, that it works a tad better backwards from the bottom upward? Just my opinion after reading it that way. Amazing how that works huh!!!

    At first I sort of felt the double use of rainbow was jarring but then in understanding how it all works, I see the why behind the double usage.

    Ah are you a Days of Our Lives fan?
    Love the shape. Love the fun of reading it more than one way.
    Laptop is dying so I'll end.
    Penquinpoet


  • quantumsurveyor
    August 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The matching of the hour glass to the words made such sense and it lifted the poem well above what might be expected. I concur with most everything that others have said. thank you so much for the read.
    Donald


  • pickers silver member
    July 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Woweee! What an awesome piece! I want to learn how to do these! Great work! I'm very, very impressed! Your words are brilliant, too!

    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 6, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      They are pearl's words worked over severely by the sculptor!
      Two Ozzie minds create havock with form and shapes!!!!
      Show the kids
      Linda & The Dragon


  • MoonLady gold member
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    A Work of Art in Words and Image

    This is a lovely and unique collaborative effort, both in words and design. I had never heard the term "Double Reverse Nonet" before, so I learned something new this evening! The shapes are very beautifully designed, and to work them out with the words and lines placed "just so" must have taken quite a lot of time and planning. The illustration that accompanies this poem is a perfect complement to the poem.

    Rhiannon

    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      To be honest hon I have never heard of the 'Double
      Reverse Nonet' either but that is what we have produced here 'I think' .
      Each Nonet (Nine lines counting syllables from nine to one per line then one to nine reversed)... can be read on it's own...up or down singularly or as a whole as we have here...also read in reverse to flow well too. I think we have created a monster
      Thank you very much for your comment and hope we have not confoofilated you to much
      Linda


  • GunRunner
    July 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Definitely Ambigramific!

    (if it's not a word, it dang well should be - thanks Dragon Slayer . . .)

    I've not seen much of your serious side, this is an excellent example - muchos thankos! (pardon my Spanish)

    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Gunny

      Gotta check that word Pleased you enjoyed. We both had fun putting it all together and proud of the end result.


  • Dragons Lady
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A beautifully and cleverly written poem. I love the form. It is filled with so much love and passion and flows so smoothly. I loved it. Well done.


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      DarkShadowAngel

      So pleased you enjoyed our joint effort which we are both quite proud of
      Linda & pearl-dragon


  • butterflywriter
    July 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    very clever...congrats...


  • Dragon Slayer
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Ambigramific

    The writing itself is profound, the word choice eloquent and the layout is inspired...you are a true artist in every sense of the word, I Commend you!

    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Dragon Slayer

      Ambigramific??? Is there such a word to tag this with?
      Your comment was very much appreciated and I thank you on behalf of pearl-dragon as collaborator on this write.
      Linda


  • robert bolin
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a very passionate write, Filled with some beautiful emotions, And the imagery was superb, Brilliantly penned thank you for sharing your work with us all here on ap, And allowing us to read and comment on your work it's an amazing write brilliantly penned.


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      robert bolin

      Thank you for taking time to read our work.
      Very pleased you enjoyed our efforts on this one.
      Linda


  • LAPoe gold member
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    DANG LINNY!!! WOW!!!! This would take me a month
    of Sundays to try to conceive,,, no, I couldn't
    do it even then... REALLY IMPRESSIVE!!! it must be
    all that 'Down Under Air' that keeps that brain of
    yours tilted just enough to write, up to down and
    down to up. GOOD WORK GIRL!!!! Doc.

    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Hey there Doc So you like my serious side just a little huh??? Gotta watch out when two Aussies get together!
      We had fun creating this one that's for sure...a pinch of inspiration and a touch of perspiration and here it it!
      Chuffed that you enjoyed
      Linny


  • The Poetic Angel
    July 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    awsomee !!! me 3T and pearl-dragon xxx cheeky xxx


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I think my time in the trees paid off
      Climbing back up again real soon
      Pleased you enjoyed this one hon
      3T


    • pearl-dragon
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much
      my dear teacher is offline right now but sure
      she will be in here tomorrow with a witty reply

  • Yvette Champ gold member
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my,the reader was impressed with the original and has always believed that nothing original is ever improved as such but rather improvized,but the reader was wrong,this is outstanding.
    This has a mass market appeal dear poet,the presentation visually pleasing and indicative of two shapes with shapeliness would be picture perfect and poetically perfect within content for a wedding gift,the words resonate with loving,honouring and entwining.
    I would encourage you to contact a greeting card publisher,this would be a treasured memento given to a couple or indeed from one to the other.
    It's adorable,different,clever,effective,creative and did I mention brilliant?

    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Big to you...what a wonderful comment
      I would not dare to dream that this could be a greeting card (really???) Your words are held close to my heart dear friend
      Linda

      • Yvette Champ gold member
        July 5, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        You are too modest my dear poetess,forgive me,I meant to write greeting card for a couples getting engaged or married,there are already many such cards on the market but I have never seen one as visually pleasing as the words themselves,seriously,you have known me for long enough to know that I don't give false praise but praise what is praiseworthy and tentatively offer a humble suggestion now and then,please bear my suggestion in mind,in all honesty I would buy a greeting card for a betrothed couple with your poem on it and if I recieved such a card I would frame it to enjoy it as opposed to putting it in a memory box.

        • Recluse Writer gold member
          July 5, 2007
          Edit | Reply

          My dear friend you make these two poets very proud to read your words of praise. I do trust your judgement and shall discuss this with my pearl collaborator.
          Much Love Always
          Linda


  • Poetress52 gold member
    July 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    very creative, nice flow, good imagery, a very good write, thanks for sharing


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Poetress52

      Thank you for your taking time to comment on our collaboration effort. Pleased you enjoyed it.
      Linda


  • YoursTrulyJulie gold member
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    AWESOME !

    Well...just when I thought there was no way of improving on something that was already a great piece of poetic crafting...you've gone and created a MASTERPIECE Absolutely bloody BRILLIANT (one for each of you )


    • Recluse Writer gold member
      July 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      We are here...together again.
      Thank you, Princess/Babe.

      One from each of us
      Terrible Two

1 - 64 of 64