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The roses

My eyes witnessed an astounding sight
The freshness of dew, the sweetness of pine
The sapphire creek, the misty peak
The smiling roses, the greenish garden

And you were there, standing beside
Plucking roses, collecting a pile
Slowly you turned with a tinge of smile
In those lips red as cherry

Those striking eyes emanated a glow
Towing me in your magnetic gaze
Then I saw you come near
My heart thumped, skipping a beat

I waited there for your one glance
For a rose with my name
Specially blossomed and sent through you
But you passed evading me

I waited and waited for so long
The seasons changed, new roses blossomed
But my garden was still deserted
Waiting for a rose from you

Is today the day? I see you approaching
With the whole basket towards me
Or as always will you leave?
Leaving me all alone here

Slowly you come very close
Now I am sure those roses are for me
You stop and look and sit beside
Waiting with the basket in your hand

With mixed emotion, I say to myself
Finally the day has arrived
As I see you with tears
Placing the roses on my grave

Author notes

66.6, well behaved women rarely make history, cherished memories, friend, option number 1- The beauty of pain contest

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • Jai Guru Deva
    August 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Ahh, yes I see it now.

    Well in that case, congratulations. Your beauitful poem is now a finalist.

    I really like the imagery. Laying roses on a grave, the whole way you described it was amazing.

    Good job and good luck.


  • Jai Guru Deva
    August 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Option??

    Good job, but I can't qualify you without the option number. Sorry.


    • Chweetkavi
      August 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Hi, I had indicated the option number as 1. but as there was many author comments I think you missed it. I have made the author comment clearer now....


  • silencethequestion
    July 28, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    beatufiul. well written thanks for entering


  • Taxing Minds
    July 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I loved this poem. So descriptive and a very good ending. Good write


  • Rose-Quartz
    July 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    An absolutely beautiful poem

    I loved every line of this poem. It is so well written,so beautifully sad. Your words touched my heart. An amazingly beautiful poem xx


  • poet2angels gold member
    July 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Such a lovely poem filled with wonderful thoughts..
    Such a sad and beautiful ending...
    TY for entering...


    Lynda


  • My Darkness
    July 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    you started to use punctuation, but that all disipated...why? that was my only rule! thanks for entering and good luck to you!


  • Ignis Corpus
    July 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    With mixed emotion, I say to myself
    Finally the day has arrived
    As I see you with tears
    Placing the roses on my grave
    i love those lines good job on this poem and good luck in the contes


  • Diggs McGee
    July 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    that's a nice poem... uh i mean a good poem. i was able to picture this garden. very nice.


  • Candy6
    July 4, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    A great beautiful poem.

1 - 14 of 14