Kiss me softly and close your eyes
against the harsh realities of this dark night
for your butterfly wants to float away
Sleep and dream of ice-cream stripped sunsets
and colourful wings on warm, spring days
for it is now my winter
and your butterfly wants to float away
Stir not at sounds of crystal tears
and whispered sobs from the corner
or at the breeze flowing through
fluttering curtains, kissing me goodbye
for your butterfly wants to float away
Cry not at the sight of the silver blade
and glinting red stains across the floor
fear not the obsidian eyes
and stone cold lips frozen in their twisted smile
for you have learnt your lesson
Butterflies Die
Author notes
just some thoughts.......a strange take on suicide i know...and proberly not what you wanted.but i hope that you liked it all the same.........it broke my writers block so i am thankful for that at least......Meus Opus Magnus and Blessed be dear friend
Alison
P.S. Don't be a stranger....just be STRANGE!!!
A contest entry
- oh, to just disappear... by CarCrashHumor.
1500 points, ended August 15, 2007, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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wow I like the part" sight of silver blade glinting red stains and cold lips frozen in a twisted smile." Great write.
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a serene lullaby ... makes it chilling.
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Wow that was really good!
fear not the obsidian eyes
and stone cold lips frozen in their twisted smile
for you have learnt your lesson
Butterflies Die
I love those lines so full of emotion. ^^ keep it up!
*no1knosme**
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thnx heaps sweety.......i actually like this one too..........and its rare for me to like my own stuff........lol
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That first stanza is so beautiful! My only real suggestion is to remove the last line. Your title explains the "lesson" and it seems like it's just a little too much. I have a problem with that in my own poetry, writing one line too many. Usually poems are best without that last thought. Otherwise, great. And thanks for your comment on "stockholm"!
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I agree with Texasangelone that it is intense. But your poem is great write.
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Intense
Very intense I was amazed at the clarity you had when you wrote this. I see things so clearly through your eyes. An amazing read....
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I don't like suicide poems very much... but I respect that you approached it differently...
good effort, and beautiful imagery
James -
it`s different. i like the way that you didnt take the view on suicide that people normally take. its deep and emotional and its obvious the work that you put into it.
+glad it broke your writer block =]
xx -
that was a wonderful piece and quite different ,though quite sad but its kind of deep ...just loved it and cant find better words than"excellent"
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