TILL THERE WAS YOU
I THOUGHT MY LIFE WAS OVER
YOU CAME INTO MY LIFE
BROUGHT ME HAPPINESS AND JOY
TILL THERE WAS YOU
I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD FIND TRUE LOVE
MY HEART NEVER KNEW
WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO LOVE
YOU CAME INTO MY LIFE
WHEN I WAS FEELING DOWN
YOU CAME IN AND PICKED ME UP
WHEN I AM SICK YOU ARE RIGHT THERE BY MY SIDE
MY HEART KNOWS THAT
WE WERE MADE TO BE AS ONE
YOU'RE MY SOUL-MATE
YOU'RE MY HEART
YOU'RE MY LOVE
YOU'RE MY LIFE
MY HEART WILL NEVER STOP LOVING YOU
A contest entry
- Show me what it feels like to want someone! PREWRITES ALLOWED!!! by Yo-Amoro-Tu.
310 points, ended November 26, 2007, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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It's one huge cliche and isn't the most amazing thing I've ever read, but it's good that you're getting your feelings out. This would be nice if it wasn't so corny... but then again, conventional romance makes me want to vomit.
Just one thing, though: why capitalise everything? The fondness of capslock makes it seem like you're irate, which doesn't quite fit the tone of the poem.
--Cristina -
Oh how beautiful life and love is when one's soulmate appears and stays by your side. I love the piece - it so clearly shows the love and you are quite good at sharing emotion with your reader. I hope this brought a smile to your soulmate's face too.
One little thing - the "your" repeated in the last stanza should be you're if I am not mistaken? Thank you for sharing your love with us though. -
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tanzite, Thank you for your comment and suggetionI I will diffently fix that I am glad you caught that for me Thanks again for your kind words they are always appreciated
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a poem filled with emotion, I know excately what you mean in this piece, I to am married and my husband is the part of my soul that makes me whole...great job
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crystalgodess,Thank you for your comment it is highly appreciated.... I am glad you enjoyed it..... and thanks for reading
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Such a heart felt poem. I to know whats it's like to have finally find the one that makes all of what you have written true. My Lily is my air that I breathe, keeping me alive, filling my heart with a tenderous joy. It's a very lovely write.
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Arcane Beast, Thank you so much for your comment it is highly appreciated. It's nice to have someone that fills our hearts and gives us so much joy. I am glad you liked my write thanks again for the comment....
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