Standing across from me
Your fading face haunts me
Tears on your pale cheeks
Whispering my death
The small spark,
Evaporated into dust
Entwined with lies
Betrayal to add a twist
As I walk away
He climbs out of the shadows
Taking my place in your heart
I recede to the depths of my soul
Author notes
Skye101
A contest entry
- Inspire Me!!! [Love Poems] **Will Be Closing Early!!!!** **Read Updates Inside!** by MagazinesFall.
525 points, ended July 8, 2007, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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This is really great write. Yougive out great emotion in this and It shows well in you poem. If had to choose a favorite part I guess it would be...
"As I walk away
He climbs out of the shadows
Taking my place in your heart
I recede to the depths of my soul"
Great Job Nice work Keep it up!!! -
Hoodwinked
This poem is a little sad sounding. I think it is a well written piece straight from you heart. Good luck to you in the contest. -
Hood-Winked!
This piece has it all, the first four lines capture the reader...I believe any real loss is best comforted by remembering what we loved most about that person, hopefully the mind won't let the good images fade
You have been ambushed by a member of the Poetic Bandits
~Lilac
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Hoodwinked
I agree very much that you have a whole lot of emotion in this short piece. You have a nack for doing that with your poems you are very good. Great job sis keep it up.
Never give up
Kate
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Hood-Wink!
A lot of emotion is a short piece .. just goes to show a good poem doesn't have to be long.
Some great images and a good flow and the sadness just bites at your heart.
Well written poet.
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really rather good
"The small spark,
Evaporated into dust
Entwined with lies
Betrayal to add a twist"
That was my favorite part reminding me of DeAngelo.
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Hood-Wink!
A very unique write!! Wonderful imagery and emotions throughout. Great flow. Keep up the wonderful writing
You have just been Hood-Winked
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This is a whole new way to look at love, it has awesome imagery and brilliant flow. Good Luck!
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