disgraceful they all said
can't stay here
they whispered to each other
heaven was not the place
for inebriated angels
but just like below
it takes all kinds
to make a world
so it is above
as well
crying will not help
so down you must go
to help others like yourself
make them see
the error of their ways
fallen angels get
second chances too
all rise again
when their
assignment is done
rusty halo
tarnished wings
replaced with new ones
when duties are complete
smile returns then too
A contest entry
- Wanted: Drunken Angel Poems by Amera.
1500 points, ended July 15, 2007, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 34 of 34
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I love the hope in
Second chances.
This is an incredible write.
So very clever.
Joy to my imagination!!
~Pastel
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the picture brought such a vision to this write love i was very touched by this piece it was a nice write from you just scrolling the reading list reading everything
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It's nice too know that we all can have a second chance in life. What a unique and interesting write. Excellent imagery and flow
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Excellent! This is a great piece, very creative and witty. I really like the rhythm. Good luck in the contest
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you are still incredible!!
Hey !!!! Long time no talk!!! How are you? I love this write!!! as I always love your mind and the way you express and view life!!! This is fantastic! GReat image!!!
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Oh. This is quite some poem that you have going on in here. The picture that you started with just blew me away because it was such a human position that the angel was in that it just struck me. Than I read your poem and was even more amazed because you brought this whole other deminision to the story of that picture. I thought you did a really wonderful job on it.
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..another chance at eternity....very interesting write...enjoyed
Lady Dragonwyck
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What a beautiful write! I love the concept here, how it's about redeeming angels, and the poem fits very very well with the picture. I, myself, just wrote a poem about angels that, currently, I really love! So I've been perusing around looking for some more poems about angels, and here you are!
The flow is very well, and sometimes, I can capitalizing letters. I never do that in my poetry, anymore; I always capitalize and punctuate things now. But I think it was very refreshing to see this in your poetry. Sometimes, no capitalization works, and here, I think it worked well. -
this was a really great poem. you have a great way of describing and an even better way of putting the image in a persons head...great job
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powerful message
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This is a beautiful take on the picture and the contest theme ... and what an interesting take it is! You give us much food for thought here. Lovely. x
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My favorite lines were
"rusty halo
tarnished wings"
That's beautiful imagery.
I like the lack of punctuation. It added to the sort of "freefall" feel of the poem. I enjoyed this a lot. -
good but a single mistake
it was good and inspiring, but i have to point out that fallen angels are now demons and will not get a second chance
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WONDERFUL
You may be entertaining angels unaware. or
It's A Wonderful life. A passage from the bible and a great movie.Thats what this piece of work reminded me of.
Great job.
I WROTE SOMTHING IN THE SAME VAIN CALLED.. Sacred Sky...
almost in the same context may or may not enjoy it.
HAPPINESS,
LOWELL POE. -
hmmmm
There are verses I adore. But some words could be left out. EX. instead of THAt rusty halo..whynot just "Rusty Halo". and "tarnished Wings" or "Duties are complete" oh and "All Rise again". sometimes that extra the , this that, and, takes away from the impact. Overall I love the concept of this poem.
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Hmmmmm........................
This was an interesting one!!! What a fresh topic!!! I liked it and it does makes valid sense!!! It should do well in this type of contest. We see what happens to the real fallen angels though {Satan and his followers} not a good ending for them at all. Still I like the story and it was well thought out and written. Good luck in the contest!!!~~Toni~~
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This is a lovely poem that almost doesn't seem to be about drunken angels, but is an extremely lovely look at fallen and--oh! look at that!--inebriated angels. It paints a vivid picture and is a wonderful way for a person to look at such creatures. Great job, you have changed that perception of mine, the best of luck~
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Wow! Very beautiful, and ver nicely written also. I liked the part where you said, "taht rusty halo" because it shows she isn't the... newest angel. This is a very beautiful written poem, and I loved the descriptions. Absolutely loved them. I liked also when you said, "Fallen angels get/ Second chances too" Because it really explained it. Very nicely done, and I also wqish you the best of luck in the contest. I love it! Keep writing!
~Pandy-Sama -
"that rusty halo
those tarnished wings
replaced with new ones
when duties are complete"
This is a beautiful piece you have written here . Thank you for sharring it ~Bret~ -
i liked this one. it revises the look that one gives to the angels on high. fallen angels do need a second chance. Thanks for sharing, good luck in the contest, and keep the pen a flowing!
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Brilliant piece of work!!!! SOOOOOOOOoo, unique and captivating.... It tell such a beautiful store!!!! We all can be given a second chance!!!!!!!!! A lovely message of fogiveness!!!! I love it! I just love it!!!
Bravo!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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this poem realy ment something to me. the way you portraid what was happening, i thought, was simple but moving! it was kinda bitter sweet to me. it gives off hope, which is something we could use alot more of. my favorite part was when you said
"fallen angels get
second chances too
and all rise again
when their
assignment is done"
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Well I won't be fluttering my wings in heaven as I love a drop or two of the red stuff.I'm sure we'd be forgiven the odd glass.Loved your poem, Ros
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I absolutely loved your take on this.
I have to be honest and say other poems of yours I read I either disagreed with, didn't relate to, or thought it was too touchy for me. You really, honestly, surpised me with this. It's beautiful.
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nice story. it was very warm. I liked the picture. The second to last stanza was really powerfully. I may be wrong but what your trying to say is Stop crying and dio something about it.
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This is a great poem. Good imagery and description. Great job!
~Erin
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lovely poem x beautiful write as alwaysx
peace
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This was an incredible poem! You had such imagery and description mixing into your words to make the reader see not only images but the feelings and emotions as well. You are such a dedicated poet and work so well with your words! I cannot wait to read more of your outstanding work and thank you so much for allowing us to read such a wonderful piece.
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Ah, this is beautiful, your words touch me
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This is truly lovely and an approach I had not thought of. I love it! I love this:
"fallen angels get
second chances too"
Love,
Amera ♥
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It's a great feeling to know
that you always have a second
chance at things in life. Wonderful
imagery here and good luck to you
with this one in the contest my
friend! Keep it up!
Jeremy0826 -
well said, on this topic....very fresh raw, cutting edge perspective....rich imagery, "rusty halo thos tarnished wings" Good luck
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