My eyes are open,
my lungs are full,
my blood is flowing,
but yet...I'm lifeless.
My soul has been damned.
I am forced to live.
Death is not an option.
Author notes
Written August 19th, 2003
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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alive yet dead, great job of expressing that, ive thought about suicide alot, and always come to realize theres too much to live for, even as bad as things get.
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Personally I'd keep this as it is.
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This is short but very good! however i have a few suggestions on how you can make it folw much better!
suggestions
where you say "but yet" take out the but
and for the last two lines
"im forced to live it out
my death is not an option" or
the other way around
"my death is not an option
im forced to life it out"
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Johnathan
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I know how this feels. This is a great write. thanx for shareing.
ash -
holy crap..awesome..loved the words..so..meaningful. do keep it up :). Somedays it just feels death would be a good option but there is always something keeping us together, on the brink of sanity :). Very good.
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I really liked this poem ur a good writer
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