I sit listening to the world click.
Axle of the earth as it turns
in hours, in movements unfelt by man.
Moon peeks out from behind
a shower curtain of clouds, hanging
so heavy over my head. Somewhere
is the beginning of wind.
Leaves clinking against each other
in a celebration of rain.
My love isn't here. Hasn't spent
the night listening to god brew up
a storm to cool us. Hasn't
whispered in my ear or covered
my shivers with his arms.
Lightning cracks open the sky
and in-between my longing and first
splatter of raindrops
the world creaks to a stop.
Author notes
second draft...
Just another rough draft...
Comments
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Outstanding!
I sensed the feeling of lonliness and emptiness within this subject's soul... simultaneously being at one with nature, while seemingly disconnected from the self. This reads like a masterpiece, I'd love to see the final draft!!

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If this is the second draft, I have a feeling the first draft was outstanding to begin with. Romantic, with that small feeling of melancholy that comes over us (me at least) when the rain hits. The rain is fun when you have someone to share it with. Otherwise I think it just reminds us how alone we are.


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"Somewhere
is the beginning of wind.
Leaves clinking against each other
in a celebration of rain.
My love isn't here."
I didn't get to see your first draft. I like where you're heading with this, Meli. I just entered a contest about storms. Good to see you posting, my Friend. I haven't been around as much lately. I've been making up for it today.
Wanda




