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Light

looking into your eyes
pools of light
echoing the marks across my body
scarred
torn flesh
forever marked by my own knife
you see me
i see me
all i see is ruined flesh
ruined life
forever stained by a knife
you see a glint of beauty
a glint of passion
a small light of hope
lost to i
realize that the scars
are not the thing of unseelie horror
but a mark of Venus
a mark of love
to most of the seelie court they show a thing of loathing
acrimonious the shining light abhorrence
shunned and left to the night
but you
you stand tall in the light and
caress the many knife bites across the imperfect flesh
my holy Sol
my light

Author notes

*Seelie and unseelie are that way because its old Celtic faerie courts not misspellings

-hystaria
tough it may sound like a poem about glorifying cutting its really about forgiveness of it

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • Sunkissed xo
    January 31
    Edit | Reply
    So beautful.
    I like how you focus on the positivity and hope of redemption and forgiveness here rather than the negativity of cutting.
    Thanks for entering my contest. Best of luck.


  • Cyanide Dreams
    January 25
    Edit | Reply
    This poem is great. It's a poem that many people have written about it, but its not like I've seen it anywhere else. It's very original. Some of the line breaks seem kind of iffy to me, but other than that its a very emotion filled and hopeful poem. Good job and good luck


  • AngelaWilliams
    January 23

    Edit | Reply
    very interesting graphology / typography and origonal use of syntax & language (i love "Sol", few people would think to use it - it makes it very mystical), brilliant effort. the varying line lengths throw the one word lines into focus very effectively. this fills me with hope. keep it up!


  • ruthie fallen angel
    December 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this is a great poem
    good luck


  • bladesrsharp
    December 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    well done, know what you mean when you said "all i see is ruined flesh" been there from both sides you made a poem about something so dark, not so dark if that makes sense good job

  • Melissa Gayle gold member
    December 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Some of the lines are slightly disjointed, perhaps combing some could help.

    I can understand the sentiment but I would have liked to see just a bit more wow within the words


  • Sunkissed xo
    December 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a very moving write. Through the despair in your words, a gentle light shines through that speaks of hope and redemption. I think this would strike hope into the hearts of many people. I enjoyed reading this. Thanks so much for entering the contest


  • Chazz
    December 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I'm not sure if you chose this based off of my old profile or not, but this is the basis of most of my poetry before. I've never seen a poem like this before though. I hate poems about cutting (I've only written one about it), but the forgiveness of cutting...a wonderful thought. Everyone deserves that forgiveness as it's not always our fault we went this path. A wonderful poem. Thanks so much for this entry and your help!


  • nature
    December 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I think....

    ...it is a lovely write, not dark as you think it to be, going by the author notes.
    You begin well end well with an impact that lights up the poem as a whole.
    You interact with thoughts and emotions in natural freedom. Thanks for entering the contest.


  • PrabhuDayal Khattar silver member
    December 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Humm..a mystic journey you took while describing the secrets of the life and made me to think its surafaces through the words you wrote..well done...


  • JinSays gold member
    December 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    all i see is ruined flesh
    ruined life
    forever stained by a knife
    you see a glint of beauty
    a glint of passion
    a small light of hope
    lost to i
    realize that the scars
    are not the thing of unseelie horror
    but a mark of Venus
    a mark of love

    Yep, this is one supermassive black hole alright.
    I dont get the cutting, the need to hurt yourself to ease pain. I do understand the theory of biting your lip so your toothache stops hurting so much. But still, people like this can suck the life right out of you.
    Beest wishes in this contest,
    love,
    jin


  • Bailey Girl
    December 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh, I know about the Seelie and Unseelie Courts, and I love that you included that! WOW! was what I thought while reading this


  • Blueskywonder
    December 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    An intense poem which sort of gives the impression in a subtle way that you sacrifice your flesh for the affection of your lover. This is emotional. Please find healthier ways ro express yourself allthough i can relate to cutting because when i was once in pain beyond words the only way i could tell people was to cut myself. Be strong live long and sparkle and shine like the great divine


  • Vars
    December 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! You have quite an articulate vocabulary. "caress the many knife bites across the imperfect flesh" i think, was my very favorite part. Very deep. Good luck in the contest, and thanks for entering!


  • ShiningNShadows
    December 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is so from a book! Anyway, very good job. Good luck in my contest!


  • WordsAndWits
    November 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is simply stunning! But please add which option you used to your Author's Notes. Thanks for entering, and good luck!


  • Jaffa-
    November 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I adored the fact that i knew exactly what you were talking about when you said Seelie court
    I read it in a book
    'realize that the scars
    are not the thing of unseelie horror
    but a mark of Venus
    a mark of love'
    I loved this part!!!
    This poem was absolutly amazing and hit so so close to home :|
    Great poem xoxoxoxoxo Good luck.

1 - 17 of 17