I cannot fade away,
I will stay where I am,
I want to be feel the breeze in my face...
In my face...
Leaving my body I travel,
to this place I've always dreamed of,
Ultima Thule,
I have sensed her presence
She was within my reach,
I have heard her whispers in my head...
In my head...
Leaving this wretched place I travel,
To see all there is to offer,
in this world...
The Gods will guide my step,
the Gods will guide my sword arm.
Walking through the fibers of life...
I will turn another page,
in the book she wrote so long ago.
I will take her far away...
Author notes
This piece is a summary of what's happening the last days, the most important time of my life.
A contest entry
- MYSTIC POETS OF AP - "THE SENSE OF LIFE" by maa.
543 points, ended July 6, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
what a unique write. I found your style of formatting to be rather intriguing! The way you kept the last line in every stanza a continuation really allowed me to grasp your voice!
excellent write!!& thank you for sharing
keep the pen flowing!!!
-
a beautiful piece of writing. Opening your
soul and speaking of her with a need that is
palpable. wonderful job.
-
Promise...sing
Unexpected approach given the title, and despite hovering on the borderline of prose retaining poetic potential ... perhaps the last line may be considered dispensable upon reflection
Hoping this comment is construed as constructive criticism
-
thank you so much for sharing with us your personal experiences during what you call "the most important time in your life" ... your words are very beautiful and sensitive, and the whole poem has a mysterious, but also a romantic note ... it reads like an out-of-the-body experience to me ... meeting astral beings or guides ...
very inspiring, thank you again for your participation,

maa





