This forsaken happiness,
I want it to leave
never to return
to thee
I hate the fact that you are here
I cast you away
yet you return when he is near.
No love like this I should rest on
and my thoughts are troubled by his smile.
I know that this isn't right for me
a child that's focus is home.
I don't know how to walk away from this.
I don't want these feelings at all
I want to run away in secreat
and never see him there until the end of fall
In december, there is no matter
I just want to be freed from this.
I don't want this chain around my neck
yet it never loosens it's grip.
I'm bound by this love I hold onto
I don't want him to know it's him
DO I LOVE HIM? To early to tell.
But it's too soon to know
if I even turn his head.
Walk talk as if nothings wrong
maybe one day that will be true.
But until then my tears
from this forbidden feeling
will comfort me to bed.
Author notes
So, in my internship we're not allowed to date, for the fact that our focus should be on Christ for this time period. Which is fine. my focus is not distored. IN fact I can focus very very well. However it's the time that I have free to feel like me, is what get's me in trouble. Do I love him?? It really is to early to tell if I ever will. Yet, it seems he occupies every free thought. I need to go do homework now just to escape this heart wrenching pull.
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