A week in this
Paradise, this
Sad device
My body melts
So quickly
How mechanical I
Have become and
Come undone, these
Thistles aren't
So prickly
My breath has
Slowed, my thinking
Scarce, my
Living farce
Is coming all
In stark mess
And I realize this is
not my world, these
colors swirled
Compare not to
My darkness
Author notes
I'm in my sisters world and it's not mine though she wishes it to be.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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good
things are so pleasant peacefull and easy, I can be happy with no concerns and around me life is vivid with color but colors and brightness are not my life and I know i must return to my reality of black and gray?
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I liked this poem al ot you are such an awsome writter kiki.
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i like it, i like it alot...its really interesting, and i love the rythym...it sounds kinda like u wrote a song instead of a poem, but then again wuts the difference, sumtimes they can be interchangeable...i kno how u feel, being stuck in sum1 else's world wen u want to be in ur own, yet tht is just out of reach....
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Ahh, I'm sorry? i didn't quite know what you were trying to put out. it kind of felt like a sense of loss. I loved the poem though.

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Couldn't quite grasp the rythym it seems, but I did like the poem. I have had the same feeling on occasion, more and more often of late, of living in someone else's world. My own rules don't apply, and I'm left wondering what to do next, and feeling vaguly confused. Good writing. Oh, typo in the last line "Myy."

1 - 5 of 5




