Blood Bath
take my soul away
never mind the screaming
tear my heart out
rip my soul away
remeber what it
used to be like
when we cared
Blood Bath
the hatred isnt over
but i lie bleeding
on the floor
because this is...
this is the aftermath
when darkness comes
to take my soul away
when my heart
lies bleeding
on the floor
that is the
end of this
Blood Bath
Author notes
randomly popped into my head
uhhh...the one with the razor and the wrist
A contest entry
- ready or not, here i come by kitkat92.
450 points, ended September 17, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Hoodwinked
this is sad, but is often in our aftermaths we find our tourniquets. Hope you find yours.
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Hoodwink
This is quite a dark poem that you have written here!
Line 6 has one little oopsie: remeber -> remember, but that's not such a big deal
Leander
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HOODWINKED!
wow ... nice dark poem here ... Oh, by the way ... you have just been visited by a member of the Poetic Bandits and we think you are special and posess great talent. I hope you enjoy your day!
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absoulutly AmAzZiNg!!!!
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kool
very nice, and dark, lol, but i like it, thanx for entering -
hmm r u a cutter? this is very depressing
, i like it
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i used to be but i stopped before i wrote this, personally i cant remeber actualy writing this.
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well done but again punctuation corral the words in its good poety but some pricipals need to be abserved if you want a continuous read that cool but you need to give us pauses and some place to end
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I like the repetition of the title. I also liked how though it wasnt a rhyming poem it had a nice rhythm and flow to it. The poem itself was wonderful, It had excellent vocabulary, depth and feeling. It wasnt one of those fuddy duddy poems, it was real...
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thanx i was pretty sad and ready to die when i wrote this but i dont remember writing it
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Amazing..
I'm impressed. The style is wonderful, it makes me so happy inside! It seems to be a bit different than your usual style, but in a good way. I love it!!!
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Ok, this is good. Very good. But it hurts the eyes....ALOT... Unless that was your intension...people arent going to take the pain to read this...
But anyway...well done. =]
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