The stage is set,
the lights are on,
and the jester rolls out to perform.
A jingle from his bells
gives off a happy ring,
as he smiles big and waves.
He puts on his show,
to please the crowed
never breaking that big happy smile
He takes a bow.
The crowd is happy,
and walk away from the jester callously
As he walks off stage,
with no regret.
A sorrow rests beneath his smile.
Behind the stage,
the jester is alone
peeling that happy mask off.
You can not compare
the pain of an unhappy jester,
living his life for the crowd.
Author notes
This is my first poem I've written in almost 2 years. I actually took a good hour looking over this to try and get the flow and feeling just right. I'm not sure how well I did that, but I can honestly say I'm happy with how it turned out. If you have any constructive criticism don't be afraid to give any.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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aw, this is sad. Very beautiful. The last stanza needs a little work, but otherwise, this is very good. Of course you should keep writing! It's an expression of the soul. It doesn't have to be anything to anyone but yourself. Keep going!
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Keep going!!
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at first i thought i wasnt going to know what your point was but it rang loud and clear at the end. this write felt to me a little strained. as you get back into the swing of things with your writing it will be great. you are great. keep up the good work
P.S. writing is always worth it. never give up on us, the readers!
smile!
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crowd? or crowed?
I would take a look at the last stanza which I like but the wording is a little off somehow. A case of I know what you mean but that isn't quite what it actually says.
As to the other I guess it depends on why you stopped writing in the first place. Did you lose interest? No ideas? Felt bad?
Of course you should write! -
Nice. Well written and full of talent.
I do agree with Shunneen and his comment. Write because you want to even if people do not like it.
Anyway, good job. -
Awww. Poor sad clown. :,(
As to not being sure if you should write more or not... write, write!
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I LIKE
If you are anything like me, laying your poetic utensils down for two years is hard to do. Just like riding a bike. I knowyou haven't lost your touch for writing. Brilliant
poetdontknowit
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You should always write if you like to write. who cares if anyone else likes your shit? I write for me; sometimes for people I know. I think this would sound way better spoken than written, maybe we have different accents? the rhyming is a little shaky, but hey, you havent written anything in fuckin forever right? I totally dig the message. It sucks being the clown soemtimes, I can relate. You might like this one I wrote called masks. If you really want to read any one elses poetry that is, and you'll proply have to dig a bit, I have a lot. actually you should read everything I've written, so you can improve, ya'know,
. haha.
peace
SeanO -
This is very good!
I'd put some constructive criticism, but I can't think of any...
It says alot...
I definitely it's worth you taking up writing again, the more you write, the more likely you'll write something good...
Great job and thanx for posting
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for the first poem in almost two years it's really good
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