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Art can't save a wretch like me

He said,
"I've been working out my dysfunctions on this canvas"
Dark colors of blue and black.
"Did you ever want to be my canvas?"

He thinks horrible things to himself,
"Even this brush stroke moves like my fist to your face."
Now, the paint has turned to deep red.
"Have you ever wanted to see my art in motion?"

The artist has a deadly smirk
The girl, his muse, stands shaking at the knees.
"Isn't it a thing of beauty"
His work is finished.

For the public view stands his masterpiece
Blotches of black and blue,
Angry red marks.
All painted onto the palest canvas

But beauty is fleeting and soon she is gone.
Even the wonder of his art could not keep her near
Even her perfection could not save him,
Not from himself.

Author notes


Cardinal, Indigo and Jet Black

Like art could save a wretch like me with some ideal ideology - Bright Eyes

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Heva Feva
    June 6

    Edit | Reply
    What a great idea! I love how the canvas was the girl being beaten, wait that sounds harsh on my part. The background is VERY over powering. What a beautiful yet sad poem. Great job. Good luck and thanks for entering my contest.
    -heva


  • TheDemonEve
    May 21

    Edit | Reply
    Blood and bruises. You are a phenomenal storyteller. I am an artist myself, and there are times when you want to use your hands to make your desires more than just ink on a canvas. This is very creative and exquisitely written. Well done!!

    Best of luck and thanks for entering!


  • LovelyLauren
    March 19

    Edit | Reply
    well, I think this is wonderful. I love the analogy of the brush stroke and the fist to the face...that was awesome. and working out one's dysfunctions on canvas is like a writer writing out her aggressions/happiness or whatever on paper. I think this is wonderful. Great job, and thanks for entering it in my contest.


  • Emmyb gold member
    March 19

    Edit | Reply
    this is an enticing write. amazing bits of imagery here and there. lovely use of colours
    Emmy


  • raw love
    March 17

    Edit | Reply
    hhhhhhhhhmmmm very interesting indeed, makes a person think. You painted a sick picture with beauty.


  • WatchingStars
    June 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    wow. this is very good. it made me want to cry. beautiful. great write and good luck!


  • blackday
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Original idea, but when you penned it, some of it came out cliche. The over use of "red" was one of them. As a reader, we understood it the first time. There's an "AHHHH" moment in this poem, but to me, everything else after that is just repeating what has already been said.

    This poem isn't going to win the contest, so I'm going to remove it. No hard feelings. You have some good stuff going on here.


    • FightOffYourDemons
      July 6, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      Yeah no hard feelings.
      I just don't really get what you're talking about. It didn't seem that way to me. And I only used red twice. The poem tells a sorry from beginning to end so I can't find the repetition.
      Thanks for commenting though

1 - 8 of 8