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My Present

There was magic when I was a child
with wonders my mind was beguiled
As elves we witnessed the splendor
not a care in my life, it was tender

Yea then one day I grew
my age about four O two
My father gave me a present
a steed that was O so pleasant

He gave me a gleaming white horse
who flew like the wind on high course
With a mane so long and hoofs of gold
my steed was birthed from a royal fold

I mounted his back and he spread his wings
And we flew through the land like elfin kings
And over the forest we’d soar
for the wonders of elfin lore

Yea now my age is a thousand and three
My horse and I rest under a tree

 

 

 

Author notes

No form; just a rhyme.

In a list

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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • Polaja Greeters member
    November 14, 2007

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    This is a beautiful and whimsical short rhyme... and I enjoyed reading it ... unfortunately because it doesn't have a monster (as the guidelines stated) I'm afraid it cannot be eligible for judging... but nonetheless it is a wonderful poem.

    Keep writing

    Polly


  • Shahrazad
    October 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You definately created a mystical elven feeling with this poem that I loved. I thought this was excellent- I could imagine this written by hand in an old animal skinned book with ornate designs around the edges. Good job. Thanks for entering it in the contest!


  • Pisces Pieces
    August 26, 2007

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    In a way, this made me think of The Neverending Story, and Falcor, though I know he is not a steed, he is white and has wings, flying around Fantasia...

    Such a sweet and sentimental tale, she really seemed so excited with the gift, and they really enjoyed each other.

    Each of these, okay so I've only read 2 (I think) in this collection, but I bet they will all feel like pieces, selections, from a much bigger story. Like they could be memories, or journal entries, or something like that...

    Wonder~ful


  • Freed by Mercy silver member
    July 7, 2007
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    You wrote this in 10 minutes?! This is wonderful, fanciful imagination soaring through poetry land.


  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    July 3, 2007

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    O' my I do love this! To be free and without care upon the magic steed:I mounted his back and he spreads his wings And we flew through the land like elfin kings...You are just to much wonderfully written


  • Laura
    June 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    ohh another amazing poem wow i love this one xxx


  • PoetsAngel
    June 24, 2007

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    This is just beautiful, with your permission I would like to print this off and read it to my daughters before bed, they are getting really tired of my magical poems, and this deserves to be read and apreciated
    Cathy


    • Amera gold member
      June 24, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      you can use anything of mine anyway you want no need to ask ever.


  • PerVirtuous
    June 24, 2007

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    I love it. I am going to send you 300 points. YAY! You win. I can't give you a silver trophy, but I'll see what I can dig up. Three Bunnies.


  • RedAquarius
    June 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Cute, flight of fancy - reminds of Pegasus and Shadowfax combined! I love anything to do with fantasy, I'm such a fan of it! At one point I had huge character backgrounds developed for several characters I played - this brought back those memories, thanks


  • FallingTwilight
    June 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Forgot something:

  • FallingTwilight
    June 24, 2007

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    This is a great piece, full of magic and fantasy. The rhyme is wonderful.

    Have a wonderful day,

    FallenPoeticAngel


  • JohnnyD gold member
    June 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Amera, and a jolly well done rhyme it is me little lassie, I'll chisel a piece of the blarney stone off for you me cubbie.

    Len


  • StarEyes
    June 24, 2007

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    WOW!!!!! No form? But wonderful rhyme! I love it!! I don't do much with rhyme, but do enjoy reading it when it is done well, and this IS done really well! You did a fantastic job on this one my friend!!!!!!

    and much love

    Nyetta


  • Whoochi gold member
    June 24, 2007

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    NO form? wait, am I on Miss form quens page (scrollls back up, yep) teasing you know , rich in imagery and can see this and illustrations as a childs book; taking all to faraway magical mystical places...well done dollface..

    • Amera gold member
      June 24, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Yea, it was a 10 min. contest. She DQ'd me for more than 10 lines. The 10 line rule was not stipulated. This place is full of idiots.

      Quote:
      Heavenly Angel
      40 minutes ago removed My Present from contest 10 entries 10 minutes
      → Reply, History


      • JohnnyD gold member
        June 24, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        screw it, its a winner to us Amera, that's all that counts

1 - 17 of 17