The brightest smiles
always hide the darkest secrets
as the loudest laughter
hides the deepest regrets
Pierce now,
through the brightest eyes
always hidden
behind a warm web of lies
Listen my son,
to the Truest Voices
always telling
of forgotten choices
The darkest Tears come
as that bright smile burns to ash
filling your lungs with smoke
this breath, your last
Finally
His clearest chuckle
Rings through the trees
letting free that empty grin:
A hint of blood on the breeze
[Lie down your knives, boy
Lie down this sharp transparent ploy]
and so they found him
Finger on the trigger
Displaying that Bright smile
pushed forth with such Vigor
and so they heard that deep laughter
for the last time
as the pistol let out
it's musical chime
At last, they found him
finger on the trigger
...a tune all too familiar
A contest entry
- LOTS and LOTS of OPTIONS!!!!!!!! *Please come look* by smntha..
600 points, ended June 24, 2007, 28 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Almost Anything Goes by bloodletter68.
300 points, ended March 13, 2008, 132 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Great storytelling in this and the ending made me shiver. Well worthy of your trophy. Love, C
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This was a real spine chiller. An awesome piece of work you have created here. It tells a story that is so true, unfortunately. Very well done. Congratulations on the silver
Soulful Woman
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WOW WOW WOW
super iper intense and powerful...dark and said and simply gorgeous...it makes me think of one my poems called "the clown" because of how he hides behind a smile and wutnot...great work!
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This is, by far, one of the best poems I have ever read. I can (unfortunately) connect to it. I had a friend who killed himself. Everybody was shocked because he always seemed so happy. I can also connect to this because I often hide behind a fake smile as well. Anyway, the rhymes and the flow were just great.
My favorite line:
"The brightest smiles
always hide the darkest secrets
as the loudest laughter
hides the deepest regrets"
Amazing job! =) -
Wow. This is soooo sad, but true to how I feel some of the time. It had a certain ring to it and the rhyme was exquistite. This was my favorite part...
The darkest Tears come
as that bright smile burns to ash
filling your lungs with smoke
this breath, your last
And the 8th and 9th stanza too. All these werre my afvorite and were the best. Great piece!!!
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