I was nose raped today while mowing
I cannot say it was attempted
for there was insect penetration
Nor can I say she was de-virginalized
for she is such a snotty slut
taking in any and all fingers
But to be beastly assaulted by a bug
who wore no protection, possibly to
be left with dreaded sinus infection
or even worse.... larva
Blow sweet child blow... those larva blues away
Hell hath no fury like a nose swarmed
and executed he was for his nasal
crimes... death by lethal shoe;
Ah, the sweet smell of success
Author notes
Summer is here and so are those damn bugs!!!!
To know you is not to love you... so bug off.
It took a serious shoe stomping for such
a serious offense.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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I feel for you
the only thing worse is when they fly into your mouth and exit via your nose
my apologies, I laughed heartily at your predicament...


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dam bugs...how dam funny is this...i kept thinking, no this isn;'t about bugs, its about picking your nose, wait , no its about bugs in your nose....hahahah "death by lethal shoe" squish, those dam bugs,....


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Well, I have to confess it was the title that drew me in! But hey, what a title! And the poem you pen really does capture "this time of year syndrome" ... I hadn't thought of it as a 'nose rape' before. Cool!


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Well, I wish I was a fly on the wall to see that happen!
I don't know why, but something about this poem bugs me.


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Nose raped?...How awful
How dare they (bugs) think they can get away with that and not cop a good whacking with a shoe
Nice one Doc
You've made my day


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I Know!!! How dare they!!! but they do!!! I hope I never
have to go through another trauma like this, my nose is
much to sensitive...
laurie
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Cheeky little buggers...it'snot right!!!
De-wing them all I say
Boogers or buggers...you just cannot win huh?
Great start to my reading for the day
Linny


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Linny, do you think I ought to have gone and gotten a
nose rape kit and had DNA taken and tested to make sure
I stomped the right bug? what if in my panic I killed the
wrong one, and Mr. Nose Raper is still out there in
my back yard waiting for the next mowing to strike again...
Doc
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That would have been a wise move Doc.
But then again if it stuck to your shoe real good there is a 95% chance it had nasal fluid on wings...if that was the case I figure you got the culprit.
Just in case plug your nose with mini tampons next time and the bugger will fly right past you (eeeew)
Taking my temperature as soon as I send this
Linny
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You are hysterical and SO NOT RIGHT!!! I love this, just unbelievably funny as hell! Thanks so much for gracing us with your humorous presence!
Love ya girly...ha!
~Tia


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He,he,,he,,, ha...ha.. Hello Tia... my nose is still
very sensitive over this disturbing subject and may
have to seek counseling...he...he..ha..ha... a few days
on the couch and a lot of nasal blowing should help I
hope... be careful is my warning.. they are out there
those insect nose rapers...
laurie
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