Instant death upon my being.
It's eyes, I wonder what they're seeing,
As it creeps up behind me,
I feel the wicked trance.
It's such a high,
I wanna dance.
Careless about the intentions,
Not wanting it to go,
No prevention.
It's fucking crazy I know.
It's like I can touch the sky,
and then something abnormal happens
as gravity I defy.
My mind tangles in fear,
My body just feels so damn weird.
The clear raindrops kiss my cheeks.
The control that I once had is merely weak.
The trepidation is blown away.
Death is leaving,
As I yell,
[COME BACK! STAY!]
I take another dose.
Sniff more shit up my nose.
My hands start to tremble.
My thoughts are hard to assemble.
I’m wasting my glorious temple.
I lay on the concrete.
Raindrops stomp on me.
The thought of no existence doesn’t faze me.
[SOMEBODY PLEASE SAVE ME]
Author notes
forget my memories : Option 6
Ale E. : Option 4
A contest entry
- Many options by forget my memories.
450 points, ended March 13, 2008, 34 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - OPTIONS!!!!!!!!! AND PREWRITES!!!!!!! by Ale E.
600 points, ended March 22, 2008, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Wow I really liked this. This is so far very different from the poems that I have read on addiction. Very nicely written.
Thank you very much for entering my contest. I wish you the best of luck.
ale xox
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Wow. Wow. Wow. This was amazing. I don't even know what to say. You did an amazing job with this. The addiction of drugs is so easy to fall into, but almost imposible to fall out of. You did a great job every word worked perfectly. Thank you so much for entering my contest. Best of luck to you.
Sam -
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I'm really glad you liked it! I'm happy you captured the meaning! Thanks for posting the contest. Much love to ya!
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gurl idk where you come up with these things pero me gustan so it dont matter you use big words lol dam u sound all professional bout it
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One word!
Your body is a temple ("my glorious temple"). It houses your spirit. Never allow anything in which is harmful to you.
I get that your poem is about drugs. You have the power and all the control you need. Remember when you were little ( terrible twos), just say NO! Pick a rigid stance, curl your fists, frown and defy the world to change your mind. Nothing there in artificial highs that is not available in life many times more.
Your poem may be an 'exploration' of a life 'wasted', but you see how powerful your words are to get me to think to comment as I did.
Just say NO and choose another path. I promise you will not regret your choice. A fight, perhaps? A sacrifice, probably (friends). Worth it? Definitely! Without doubt! Jadon
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Thank you Jadon. This will sound weird after you read this poem, but I've never even touched drugs before. I like to put myself in different people's shoes, and that's how I go about most of my poetry. Most of the time it's about someone else. Thank you so much though! I really appreciate it!!!! =]]
Much love. -
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I was hoping so ("never touched drugs"). You did well at "putting yourself in different people's shoes" Like I said your words were powerful and drew a reaction.
I realize much poetry is "in different shoes" and hope if I ever write a poem where I kill someone that you don't turn me in! Be well Jadon -
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I think if you ever do...I'll keep hush hush* hehe.
Again,
Much love.
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I simply love depressing poems and on a somewhat basic level your poem really spoke to me...
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