you feel like starlight
brushing across my eyelids when everything else is empty.
you are a whisper of heaven, perhaps the only one I’ll ever hear,
rustling your wings across the sky and fluttering your eyelashes my way.
oh, my Virtue, you hold my universe in your hands,
dropping celestial roses at my feet.
yet for all your feathers, you cannot cover my eyes
against what will happen- you haven’t enough wings
Author notes
**The fifth choir of angels are The Virtues- they control the cosmos
**The Seraphim, the first choir, have 3 pairs of wings, one that they use to cover their eyes
the picture is "Angel's Wing" by Glenda Hawthorne
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Very deep I must say. Profound use of words also. I like how personify your feelings also. The only part I didn't fully understand is what the last two lines mean???
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thank you so much! the last lines basically mean that no matter how much I love the person, and how perfect they are, it's not quite enough to hide reality. hope that helps!
.:Marie:.
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Beautiful
This is an exquisite piece. It is so angelic yet so human - powerful yet so fragile.
I loved this!
Love and hugs *hug* *hug* *hug* - joanne
...btw....I love the lack of punctuation and caps except for Virtue - well done!
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Promise...sing
One is at a loss to explain the loss of capital letters to begin sentences - be it in poetry or prose. In the case of this composition both the title and the verse itself elevate Virtue at the expense of 'my' but should this not be implicit rather than explicit ?
There is poetic potential in this composition though one cannot refrain from feeling disappointment at the last phrase ...
It is the inner eye (especially that of the poet) which experiences events - either real or imagined - and strength is not necessarily to be found in numbers ...
Hoping this is construed as constructive criticism ... -
Abstract and obscenely creative! I love it! An angel trying to protect someone they love from the world... a beautiful, if vain attempt at protecting someone from a world they have to live in and interact with.
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Bravo
I love the synergy between the picture, poem, and your notes. I got the vision of the seraphims from the poem, and was glad to see that it was on your mind as you wrote it (always nice to actually understand a little as intended). I didn’t get the Virtues reference, just something beyond my experience I guess…but for all that an excellent poem. I liked the “you feel like starlight, brushing across…” very much. Made me consider what it is that starlight ‘feels’ like. Again, bravo.
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thank you so much- I'm glad you liked it
.:Marie:.
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This is so creative and so beautifully written. You are very talented! I can't really relate it to the picture you included, but it's abstract of course. Great piece!
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also- thank you so much!
.:Marie:. -
the picture is fracture art- of an angel wing
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