Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Weave despair

Weave despair

Take this ember

Cast this flame higher

Singeing God and his angels

Bringing a bit of hell back home


Pain

Eternal staff of injustice

Heavy

Unforgiving

and, it seems

all mine

Author notes

Blahhhh.......

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • CaliOkie silver member
    December 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Ouch.

    Oh, no, it is not all yours for there is quite enough to go around. I've mentioned this before, but you are very good at creating the dull ache in the reader. That kind of chronic, quite, despair that rides on the back and grows more weighty as one reads on. At the end of it all, I am emotionally exhausted as it seems you have taken a chainsaw to my one last good nerve.

    Good work.

    CaliOkie


    • Despairkitty
      December 31, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Well Im not sure if I should be happy or sad that I cause these feelings in my readers. Thanks for the comment, I really appreciate it.
      Despair


  • Angel Baby Blu
    December 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I get the vibes that you are upset and angry, which is very cool


  • Tim20Evens
    November 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I really like the part Pain...Eterenal staff of injustice..nice


  • SuPeR FrEaKy
    September 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    why would u wanna singe God and his angels???
    It seems that ur blaming Him for something that happened in ur life.

    • Despairkitty
      September 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      It wasnt so much blaming God as it was a bit of vivid imagery. People seem to react stronger when you use Christian images in a piece to get your point across. Besides I never claimed to be a Christian, so if I feel like blaming the Christian God, I believe I can do so. Poetry is a free form of expression after all. Thanks for reading and commenting.
      Despair


  • Kindredblood
    August 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    know how you feel, at times anything that is anything all seems to just fall onto the shoulders making everything just seems to go slow, and almost become unbarible, emotions burnt out, head feel too big brain fired, gotta hate these times, awesome write, bought your words to life, through the fact it felt all to real, the images, were awesome and reading this poem is something I needed, my days have been crappy the last few months, excellent poem.


    • Despairkitty
      August 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks. I appreciate the comment and the applause.
      Despair
      Hope your days imporve soon.


  • ellipsist
    July 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    this is a very powerful

    ending to this piece... I like the tone... very severe and extreme and unforgiving... like the damage and consequences are permanent...

  • Diatribes
    June 25, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    The "joys" of ones own personal hell....

    • Despairkitty
      June 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      lol..yes you got that one right. Thanks for reading and commenting. I need to catch up on your writing.
      Despair


  • My Darkness
    June 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow this is dark.. i love it! you have put some strong emotion in this write, keep them coming! please!!!


  • shadow summoner
    June 20, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    wow, wonderful job!! (your poetry is always so wonderful!) hehe, this is'nt blahh at all!!


    • Despairkitty
      June 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks hun!!! I have missed you. I am glad you are back.
      Despair


  • Haunted Doll
    June 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    "bringing a bit of ell back home" ha i like that whatda ya mean blahh?

    • Despairkitty
      June 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I just mean blahhh...my poems have sounded better in my head then on page(screen) lately. It sucks..... thanks for reading hun. I always love my twin.
      Despair

1 - 19 of 19