And the only sorrow
Is the unwelcome end
To sweaty faces smeared fatigue
That finds the cool splash
Of still pool water
Like cold ignorance of
Those days both hazy and unending
A contest entry
- T. Hughes - Seven Sorrows to choose from... by truembrace.
600 points, ended July 5, 2007, 4 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Rich,
It is amazing how easily fatigue and the toil of hard labor can be washed away - forgotten. The last two lines really pull this poem together. You say so much with so few words.
Helen -
very nice
This gets a 10 on my richter scale. I love the way you started this poem with the word 'And' as though it was a continuation of an (aforethought?) does that word make sense? Well... does to me. Truly this is wonderfully written.
Chrissy
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Perfect. It's short and to the point, but yet you leave lots of room for visualizations and imaginations. It's kind of abstract to me as I read it...as if it's a trick poem actually. That you're telling us one thing, and we're supposed to understand another. Whether or not you meant it that way, and whether or not I'm the only person who thinks that, I think I like it. It leaves a lot of room to think. I must've sat staring at this poem for five minutes thinking about it where I'd stare at poems that are three pages long for about two. Good Work, hun.
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WOnderful write...I like the poem it was perfect
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Wonderfully written! Love how each word emphasises the meaning of the next. Short but sweet! Keep up the good work!
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A cool splash
So approiate for these hot & steamy days. But much more to read into then just that
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there is a startling sort of effect in this poem - perhaps with the cold water image you put into these verses. the still pool water has me wondering as to why it goes unused with such hazy days - that the day is so long to go without enjoying the outcome of the work week at all... that the daily grind has taken every ounce out of us until what we have seems a moot point (for lack of a better word).
solid imagery and so much said in so few lines... well done indeed.
thanks so much for taking the time to enter into the contest.
Kim
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