THE OTHER SHOE
it's about fucking time
i heard absence makes the heart grow fonder.
or does it really just let you forget?
hold on a minute!
i'm not there yet!
i guess i can honestly say,
i don't really know what i want.
but going through the process of elimination,
i'm pretty sure i know what i don't.
i suppose i have to make some changes.
BUT FUCK!
ain't it about fucking time!?!
and we know all the reasons why.
i just hope this son-of-a-bitch,
ends up in a rhyme.
it's about fucking time...
think i'd like to try to be happy now.
but i have no past experience to compare it to.
it's on the other foot now.
you know what i'm talking about.
that shoe.
i'm talking about that other fucking shoe.
by GYPSYfish
just read it.
Comments
1 - 43 of 43
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Real anger!
Ms Sexy, Ephiphany and myself are all working through are anger issues. So, I'm in your corner on this one. By the way, they are the other group officer and group leader of the 'FALLEN Angels'. Hint! Hint! Hint!
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Nice read... but sometines that shoe can always change sizes .... ... at least thats what my mothers motto always said.... sory for your Pain...
Your friend in Poetry... JackReed3.....
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hey jackreed3
you know i have wore a size 4 1/2 since i was about 14 years old. so i don't know about that... ha/ha. love gypsyfish
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Interesting
I've always heard about "The Other Shoe" dropping, and I find it very interesting that in this poem you talk about wearing that other shoe. It brings a new dimension into it. Thought provoking poem that is well written and fun.
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interesting. we walk all our lives in our own shoes , yet sometimes we never put on that other shoe. ( well if shoe fits....) in a way this can be related to relationships, friendships , or just life in genral keep writing and great poem!
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hey Poet-of-the-shadows
yeah, if the shoe fits man. ha/ha. love gypsyfish
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Hard times with love...leaves on bitter...but once the other person feels what you had to feel, it somehow makes us feel better. Good thoughts through out this poem...hope your future is full of real true love, that will sprinkle you with sugar...thanks for sharing
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i believe
unlike most, time apart makes the heart forget, ive never seen/read anyone mention it like this
i like it
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The frustration and anguish in this speaks volumes to me.
Change is never easy but often neccesary.
Excellent poem.
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nice work on this piece. i thought it was funny, sarcastically cute and real-life sad.
GBY
SilverButterfly
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Great point of view and really clear about your feelings.You did a great job of rhyming here and the words flowed very well.I think that most of us have felt like this at one time or another.You did great it was easy to understand and really good.I look forward to reading more of your work in the future.
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LOL I love this!!
it's quirky and sarcastic,
and it makes complete sense to me
but that isn't really a compliment to you ;)
seriously..It's awesome!
Glad I stopped in~Velvet
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Very Funny write u have irony in this poem
i heard absence makes the heart grow fonder.
or does it really just let you forget?
hold on a minute!
i'm not there yet!
i guess i can honestly say,
i don't really know what i want.
but going through the process of elimination,
i'm pretty sure i know what i don't.
I like how you put the first two lines in this poem -
Hey we all are there sometime. I think this is good, I have written a few poems that are free verse and end up having some rhyme in it also, kind of all over the place with different styles. I like the what if, not all should have to end up with such a deep meaning to it. It is what it is and this is fine. Good write, enjoyed the read and thanks for sharing your work.
Jen -
I found this more strange than brilliant... not to say it was bad... or good... I liked the passion I just wasn't sure what you were rambling about.
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ok. thanks. love gypsyfish
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tarja
thanks for your lovely comments. ha/ha love gypsyfish
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I thought this was brilliant. I love the abstract vibe to it, we all think in abstract ways don't we??Like this a lot-and the line:
think i'd like to try to be happy now.
I know the feeling.
In fact it all makes sense to me, a what the eff is going on and what am I doing?? poem, which does indeed rock.
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In a word... this is simply fabulous! You really have quite a way with words. Thank you for sharing and best wishes to you. Keep that pen handy dear poet. ~Midnight Lace
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ends up in a rhyme.
it's about fucking time...
ahh by destiny you write well your hearts strength, for the fork in the road type feel to this, is alike the schroader cats experiment alive and dead in one, quite the achievement...
nice simple effective one rhyme and great punctuation,
cheers w beers -JAS
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thank you
you are so weird! I LIKE YOU SO MUCH!!! thanks for the comment. love gypsyfish
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Well, the first commenter said this was awkward, but as I read this, I think it's supposed to be. It seems like the narrator of the poem feels awkward. It describes to me that point in life when you feel awkward, when there are these decisions you're supposed to be making, or at least that you want to be making, but you don't know which one you should make. The poem shows a kind of exasperation over life...it's very candid.
Yep...so... *awkward*
Nice poem.
-Meg
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well golly!!!
and thank you. love gypsyfidsh
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hey!!!!
because it is the truth? (my truth anyway) or because it hits to close to home. love gypsyfish -
... That was awkward the entire way.
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well gosh!
what is that suppose to mean? i guess i'm sorry. love gypsyfish -
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Well, I don't know why but It was a bit unsettling to me.
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I hear ya! loved your honesty
I hear ya too! loved the honesty of this write, you
let the words flow so we could be a part of your frustration and feel it...you make us feel. Keep
writing! you are becoming a great lighthouse writer
perhaps even a Moonbeam too! we'll see...so honest
and bold! (won't even tell you how many other shoe's
I finally threw out!)
ears2hearyou
Kathleen
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hey you!
i DO NOT throw away ANY of my shoes. hell, i shoes older than most of the kids running around here today...ha/ha love gypsyfish
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I enjoyed piece. A very interesting read. I liked the lines "i don't really know what i want.
but going through the process of elimination,
i'm pretty sure i know what i don't."
All and all, a good read.
Keep up the good work.
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This is a fabulous piece, I know all about the shoe on the other foot routine and it is rare for me to say something rocks the socks off me, but this has, so great job
karen -
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thank you for your opinion
thanks for reading my stuff. i'm glad it 'rocked your socks off'!!!! i looked into some of your stuff. you know that 'mountain' your talking about? well sometimes, it's only a grain of sand. SOMETIMES IT'S A REALLY BIG FUCKING GRAIN OF SAND!!! but it's only a grain of sand, most of the time. and about the reflectons, well hell, read my write on 'reflecitons'. love gypsyfish thanks for the comment.
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Very interesting poem, here. The cussing wasn't jarring as it would be in some other poems, it added to the mood. You did an excellent job here.
Write on.
~*~SP~*~
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This is awsome!!!!!! Excelent flow, every word was chosen very well to fit with the feel of this peice!!! I really don't know what else to say about this peice other than I loved it! Great job and keep up the gret writing!
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'the road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom'
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i think weve all wiritten this poem in our brains at some point, however you do capture the anger and self pity/ loathing really well in this poem!
ive written something along the same lines called, I Need You, It's Over.
FeliX -
interesting
a very intriguing and different type of write..kept me interested and figuring it all out so that, to me, makes it worthwhile and a good write! -
congrats
nicely done, keep it up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and i dare you to excel more in writing! keep up the amazing works!
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stream of consciousness...I can hear your thoughts. Now, what about it you took this emotion and tightened up the whole thing? This could be the beginning of a good poem with a little more control...
The Other Shoe
I had heard absence makes the heart grow fonder,
or does it really just let you forget
what all those sons-of-bitches
did to you?
I guess I can honestly say,
I don't really know what I want,
but going through the process of elimination,
I'm pretty sure I know what I don't.
Oh, I suppose I have to make some changes, but
FUCK,
ain't it about fucking time!?!
I think I'd like to try to be happy now,
but I have no past experience to compare it to.
It's on the other foot now,
you know what I'm talking about,
that shoe,
I'm talking about that other fucking shoe.
by GYPSYfish
just some thoughts. -
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six of diamonds
you really think so? it seems like self control is the one thing i don't have. it works for me just like it is. love gypsyfish
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Good to let the anger out; venting is good. Seems as if you got rid of a bit of anger in these lines - like kicking a wall, or punching a bag, let that excess leave. Shoes come in pairs, and usually are both the same, except one is for one foot, and one is for the other, but both fit together as a pair. Liked the metaphor you used in these lines - sometimes that other shoe just doesn't fit just right!
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hummmmmmmmm
i hope you get what you are waiting for. You do know how to use bad words. Happiness and joy to you.
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Great write
lol..Strange but I can not tell if you are angry or just letting off some steam..? great write..
and yes its about time to put what ever it is on that other shoe..
peace
~A~
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