your hopes and dreams were high
you had a lot to get there with
you were smart, outgoing athletic
even though inside you were a bitch
you kept that inside you
your toxic and you hatred
so people at first didn't see it
but on your friends it was elated
and then you picked up a joint
and cocaine and pills and syringes followed
you kept up to your standards
but eventually you were swallowed
you haven't given up on your high mental state; your numb
but eventually I'm sure you will feel pain
when all you tonics leave
and the artificial highs drain
don't you realize the needle does nothing good
and what happens when the butterflies are out of reach
how will you function, what will you do
when your perfection is eventually breached
cant you learn from you mistakes
or do you think you know more than them
were you unloved as a child
no, you were spoiled, how did you ever get sucked in?
you ripped off your friends to fuel you addiction
not the second feeling of sadness and rain
but only payed attention to the sudden high and glitter
and you stuck the metal deep into you vein
feel the high the poison gives you
as the metallic rainbows flash through your minds eye
feel the power and rush it contains
but cant you see its all trickery and lies?
so now I'm watching you
waiting for you to finally snap and fall through
as you stand bleeding and bruised
and your nightmares finally consume
as the drugs leave the tattoos on your brain
you will eventually see
hindsight 20/20
you threw away what you could have been
for something you will never be
Author notes
love happens once in a lifetime. the difference lies in how many time you're willing to live in the time that you're alive.
A contest entry
- Truth of Life contest Round ONE by xandercheerios.
450 points, ended June 17, 2007, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 10 Options ... Simple as that =] by Manda Kathryn.
600 points, ended July 1, 2007, 25 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - oogaboogashoogalooga...this is serious by Starlette.
525 points, ended December 7, 2007, 150 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Hey there, firstly allow me to apologise for the late judgement of this contest, I'll be honest, the drug imagery unsettled me, but the toxic hatred, nice touch. One or two typo's, nothing major, lack of punctuation, needs attention, but the piece as a whole, nice job, well done. Thanks for the entry and best of luck in the contest.
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Sad story, many people live in this cobweb they weave. It never made sense to me how people could put their mind and body through this torment. Shit happens, some we can help get on with their life's and others it's not possible. Excellent write. Good luck in the contest. For what you've been through you deserve it.
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Jovie,
First off, Thank you very much for your entry in my contest =]
Second, I absolutely love this; Not only does your word use help paint the picture of a person lost and trapped in a world unknown, but you also keep your sensitive side showing as you try and help them through. Fantastic
Excellent !
Best of luck =]
Stay safe
~Amanda
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Wow, what a message, and I'm so glad you got it in on time! And the ending... very awesome! The ending is the key part to a poem, you will always hear me say that, and I really believe you've pulled it off to a tee! Other than a few times where you write you instead of your, there wasn't any errors that caught my eye. So good luck in future rounds, and I hope you can continue this theme clearly into the next round.
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