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The Day I Left My Mother

The day I left my mother,
The earth cried in tear.
Rain was the tear of the earth,
My mother cried on that day after my birth.
I was a selfish son, who did not understand a mother’s pain.
I did not pay any heed to the hard rain.
To me rain meant nothing,
It was just a coincidental raining.
The day I came back to my mother,
I searched everywhere for her.
She was nowhere to be found,
because she had no earthly bond.
The earth did not cry on that day.
Instead rain came out from my eye.

Author notes

Option 2

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Euphy
    February 7

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    Oh my! How emotional and strong this piece is. And sad, how very sad. It's a lovely write, though the rhyme seems a tad forced. Still lovely. =]


  • cafegroundzero gold member
    August 22, 2007

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    Ya! Illahee.

    Here is a poet worth my staying up all night long and then some time.

    How long did we wait for the rains, o my people?
    How long did we wait for rescue, whilst trapped in the trees in the flooding waters?
    How long and then how glad were we when finally the help arrived?

    Oh ungrateful people! To you did the Prophet speak, but ye did heed Him not!

    And for those few that did, what wonders await?

    Thank you, O brother poet.

  • mina nagi
    August 12, 2007

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    Very Touchy

    We never realize the love of mother till we explore the attic.... you'll find every letter you sent her, Mother day's cards, school report since day one... the list is never ending like her love...
    This has touched me deeply... my mum is my inspiration... but I write to the contrary to the content of this poem because she left me while i was very young...

    I liked the usage of metaphores and the comparassion of tears with rain...

    keep it up... thanx for your brief comments on my poem...

    mina

  • Leaving Today
    June 24, 2007

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    Different, Beautiful & Touchy

    This stands out of the crowd. A different type of entry on the given option. The words came out of realization and this touches me perhaps because I am not a good child always. I like the following lines most:

    "She was nowhere to be found,
    because she had no earthly bond.
    The earth did not cry on that day.
    Instead rain came out from my eye."

    Thank you very much for taking the time to write this beautiful poem for my first contest and thanks also for following the rules properly. Please do not reply my comment until the contest is over. Wish you all the best in the contest.

    Best Wishes,
    Sweet Silent Talker


  • Shapla
    June 16, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    The entire piece is so touchy. I loved reading it.

1 - 9 of 9