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kitchen facet overflow


I overfilled my glass
with emotion.

With each step,
I spilled I love you’s
on the tiles;

you tiptoed around
every puddle,
watching me

slip –
& fall.

So you forced me to swallow
concussions
& hard floors

as you quenched your thirst
elsewhere.

Did you ever realize
that we were the same blood type?
It was your blood

I poured.



A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • neurosine gold member
    June 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    People are basically selfish. I will never cease to understand why it is that people who aren't being selfish expect their standard to apply to their objects of first love, then almost inevitably derision. Hmn. Good write. Don't get me wrong. But it certainly raised the question.


    • lavender shadows
      June 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      It's true though. Whether you want to or not, most people do end up being selfish in some way or another. And someone who isn't being selfish expects others not to be, which is selfish in a way as well. Hmmm... very interesting thought you bring up.

      Thanks so much for your thoughts and the comment


  • zillion
    June 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Damn. Wow this was good. The title and the poem both were extremely strong. I was impressed.


  • Disturbed Prodigy
    June 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow, i mean really wow, you did a great job on this, i enjoyed reading it, keep it flowing and good luck in the contest


  • Hadji Murad
    June 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Christina,

    This metaphor is so remarkable I want to cry or something like that. Or perhaps it's just me being overly emotional and really this poem sucks. Just kidding! Anyways, joking aside:

    This is so good, like beyond words. The metaphor is stellar, the imagery is keen and beautiful, the words are profound and the flow, well, it's like water. This is a masterpiece in poetry.


    • lavender shadows
      June 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Water-like flow, eh? Maybe you slipped on the metaphor yourself?

      Thank you so much, Nate


  • Girl With Guitar silver member
    June 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. I must say that this ended better than it started, but it didn't take much at all to get into it and the flow is amazing. Great use of metaphors and good luck in the contest.

    Bandaid.


  • Griswold silver member
    June 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, ok, just wow...

1 - 12 of 12