Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

the world to day

I sit back watching, the world spin out of control
the youth robbing people, young and old
the murders and the rapes, wheres the discpline gone
the police took over the job, of the dads and moms
they say smacking a sin, we cant control our kids,
but how are we suppose to, with the rules the governments brought in
We try to teach the values of how our lives should be
But they went and took away our rights, let our kids roam free
Just the other day I had an argument with my child
she told me very strongly" she can do what she wants go wild".
Dont bother ringing the police docs or any help
the goverment will give me my own money, I can live by myself.
Well she is only a child, only turned fourteen
how can this be helping her, with the horror that we have seen.
We need to take control, try to help them get through
stop or the pain and horror, that we see on the daily news.............

A contest entry

this poem is true the kids these day get away with so much.... its is society letting them by all their new rules.....

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 6 of 6
  • Raven Judge
    July 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    There is probably a rudamentary element in play with regards to the rhyme scheme and overall construction of this piece, but there is *nothing* basic about your feelings or your point. You are clear, articulate, and best of all: correct.


    Thank you for your entry.

    ~Das


  • earthstar
    July 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This hits the agreements of today world. This is our future generation. I truly wonder how it will be when our grand children our parents. What the sad part is when you listen to a foster child raised in the system. They come out with far more hurts. Neither sides wins in this debate. I feel you capture your views very well. The content is good.


  • bloved
    June 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow I can totally feel your funstration

    I'm 16 and I hope that society isn't gonna be the same when I have kids.

    "they say smacking a sin, we cant control our kids,
    but how are we suppose to, with the rules the governments brought in"

    I like this line because I think there are sme kids out there who need a firm smaking on the behind!

    My mom is old school and she doesn't play the whole taking back to elders or herself...

    So I agree kids today need to give some respect to their parents so they can recieve it

    Thanks for entering


  • Florida Sunshine
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I am not sure how much the world has changed or how much we are just being desensitized to... I think many of those same things went on before just never reported like it is today. I like the way you communicated your views! Cut clear...

  • skaldkraft
    June 16, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Sorry something happened and the contest will have to be cancelled

  • skaldkraft
    June 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow--the content of your piece is very hard-hitting and accurate concerning "these times." The pain of life, the ache, really comes home when it's your child. You expressed the situation very well with rhymmed couplets. The flow of ideas and imagery is strong. My favorite line is the second from the bottom.

    "We need to take control, try to help them get through."

    I'm with you, something has to change--and soon.

    Thank you for entering the contest.

1 - 6 of 6