For the single tear
my true love cried.
Is not a fraction of mine
when I learned he lied.
To touch his face one more time
before he walked away,
Broke my heart for there
was so much I wanted to say.
When I need them the most
my words seemed to fail me.
I knew in my heart true love
I would never again see.
But my heart would not allow
my lips to form a word.
The sound of my breaking heart
was all that could be heard.
Unfortunately life goes on
I tried not to let him see me cry.
Taking my hand from his handsome face
I mouth to my love goodbye.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Great!
Beautiful poem! Loved this one.
I absolutely LOVE the imagery and rhyme.
the starting is awesome and i love the part where u see "the sound of my breaking heart was all that could be heard"
only other comment would be, try working on having a uniform number of syllables in the lines so that when one reads the poem to himself, there is a rhythm.
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Absolutely splendid, could envision this happeneing. Great heart pouring soulful write, very well formed and smoothe......excellent. Best of Luck! TY for entering...
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Your words sound genuinely true and as though they come poring out straight from your heart. A very moving piece you’ve written here. Best wishes to you always
Dove
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This is what its all about
How beautiful true emotion when unbridled by the weight of thoughts. This is a good example of not letting analysis get in the way - so much so that I can indeed interpret this in a couple of ways while allowing these words to so beautifully be colored by meloncholy love. I do hope you are alright but I also know that this IS why we come to earth.
Love takes its time.
Love will sort it out.
chalice -
it is interesting your take on lost love, and it would seem as if you yourself have been hurt....
if so i give you hope that things will get better...
now about that poem itself it has simple wording which in this type of piece i find very good...
you only down fall is the flow of the poem did not seem to pull me in as i was reading it...
other than that it was a very fine piece...
i wish you luck for the future...
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"For the single tear
my true love cried.
Is not a fraction of mine
when I learned he lied."
this really struck me, because i had something happened
that this reminded me of
it was with a girl though, but this poem really moved me
youre a fantastic writer, keep it up
the title fits this piece
and the way you started and ended it was amazing
good job
Muffin Girl
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wooowwww that poem rocks if you were on stage i would totaly mosh pit to that that poem is so full of emototion nothing should be changed on it i love it!!!
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Wow this was really powerful. I could really feel the emotion in the poem, you were really hurting but it was in a bitter sweet kind of way. This was awesome, I'm really glad I got a chance to read this, keep writing and take care, QueenT
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