It's the number of times
I looked across the courtyard
To see you standing there
Laughing among mutual friends
It's the number of times
I wanted to say something
Anything at all
To let you know I care
It's the number of times
I pray for your happiness
That tomorrow you will laugh and smile
Even if it’s not with me
It's the number of times
I’ve gone over in my head
What I’m going to say
When I speak to you next
It's the number of steps
I take to walk to your house
I don’t know where it is
But I bet I’ve passed it by
It's the number of moments
I think of you each day
Picture your face in my mind
Us walking hand in hand
It's the number of times
I’m thankful each day
That I was able to meet you
On that cool November night
Five thousand times throughout my life
I'll try to run anew
Five thousand walks of life will always bring me back to you
Author notes
The number is my title but it is implied in the poem as well. This was a very personal write for me. I truly was inspired by that number.
A contest entry
- Celebrating 5000 Comments! by intanglio2ring.
525 points, ended June 17, 2007, 13 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Great Poetry! by Not-The-Sun.
650 points, ended June 29, 2007, 33 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything you want #3 by writeme10.
600 points, ended July 3, 2007, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I think the title to this poem is brilliant!
It's such a simple idea and yet it is extremely effective. I can certainly say I've been in your shoes before, and have a habit of slipping regularly back into them!
I really like the resolution towards the end of the poem though, how you are satisfied just to see the other person. The only thing I thought, was perhaps a single rhyme at the end of the poem, contrasting the blank verse, might have helped to mirror that sense of resolution and acceptance.
A great poem though.
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I took your advice on adding a bit of rhyme at the end. Thanks
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Its a beautiful poem! It shows such passion, such...deep love...admirable...brilliant!
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5,000 is a large number. Did you stop looking at that person as soon as you hit that number? It had a lot of passion which is good to see. Thanks for the expression.
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ooh what a lovely write!! the thoughts are so sweet, i can tell you put a lot of personal emotion into this, well done. good luck in the contest and thanks for entering!!
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And Don't They Just Keep Staying On Our Mind!
Beautiful,
You've brought home the point where it's infatuation all the time. We breath with them whether they are here or not!
An excellent entry!
Tang
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