Silence, when it’s empty,
disturbs me. It is less
than a zero holding space.
Silence, full of your spirit,
enlivens me. Rich, redolent ~
an ocean to be sailed.
When you leave me,
no matter the length of time,
I am feet wearing a path in sand.
When you are present,
every moment
becomes part of love’s forever.
I am not a man of shadows.
I face the sun, greet waves
uproariously, love with all my heart.
You own the sun,
dance in every drop,
salty and free, love from the start.
4:44 PM
6/12/07
Newington, VA
Author notes
Option 1. This is the other poem. I wait to hear your choice.
In a list
A contest entry
- Release your creativity, options to help you! by Lauren Noir.
600 points, ended July 1, 2007, 25 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 36 of 36
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Good
The words took stage and treated the reader to a glimpse of your heart. Your word choice is good and the message sent is strong and emotional. Your emotions and wit wrap themselves around your words and the effect is desirable to the reader.
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So nicely analytical.
Yet, feelings so rarely accept cages and only breathe to be felt, we rarely do more than notice and tell a story about what it means. I am glad that this poem pushed against all the cognitions and provoked a response. 
Peace & Light
Tom B.
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Great write!
This poem is thought-provoking and has wonderful flow and rythem. I love the way it's been set up, it makes the write all the more powerful. The phrasing really catches the readers attention and makes them curious enough to make them want to read more!
My favorite parts are the forth and fifth stanzas. This is very nicely penned, and I love this poem. Thank you very much for sharing and spending your points on feauturing this, because this was certainly worth reading! -
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thanks for sharing your joy, what greater compliment could I ask for. I am glad to hear that my structure supported your journey. I use it for both that reason and to support my phrasing when reading aloud at an open mic. Please stop by anytime and visit a poem of mine. If you ever want a cogent comment or two you are welcome to send me a link to a poem of yours.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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Open acceptance - facing happiness full on.
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I would hold more but my arms are not big enough
Good to see you Alan, may your year be fresh with life's gifts and wines in every way.
Peace & Light
Tom B.
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A delightful and intense piece of writing that transcends the often overdone subject matter.Thanks for sharing this.
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Truly, a very high compliment. I always seek to create something that rises above the mundane. Unfortunately it is easy to be pedestrian even in the usual. So I listen for the sublime and sometimes it graces me. Again, my thanks for the kind words and shared pleasure
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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I almost didn't comment, seeing as you have so many already, but I really appreciated reading it. The ocean visuals made me feel like taking a deep breath and smelling salt and ocean air. I feel like hugging someone.
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always comment, please
Your response is special. I wanted this one to create a sense of specialness and a feeling of being desired. Your wanting to hug someone speaks volumes to me and makes me feel as if I have succeeded.
Love, Tom B.
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Your so romantic.
And by the way I like when you say this lines:
I am not a man of shadows.
I face the sun, greet waves
uproariously, love with all my heart.
It means something special to me. -
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Yes, I am a romantic, a sensualist, a visionary ~ A man who wants to be part of the whole shebang. It is always intriguing to find my poem touches someone in a special way.
Peace & Love, Tom B.
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Great Visuals!! The whole poem was quite intriguing. i really like it.
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Thanks. I was taught that poetry was built around the metaphor. I try to use them to open eyes. Again thanks for taking the time to leave a comment.
~ Tom B.
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Hmm...now that's a thought; "empty silence". Very clever! Loved to breathe in that second stanza. The third is swollen with visual image. I see the footprints. You are a romantic as it seems. She must treasure your musing. Very beautiful!
[psa]
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A sensualist, a romantic, a man of faith ~ all these things and more. Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts. They touch my heart.
Love, Tom B.
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Simplicity is much more eloquent that going on forever about everything. Silence is simple, yet filled with memories, thoughts of those who are not there to share the moment. Are you finished the 30 days of love poems yet?
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They are all done and in the List ~ "Thirty Days, thirty poems of love." Thanks for asking. I am a Quaker so you can understand why Silence is central to my thinking.
~ Tom B.
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hey...this is great
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Thank you
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Very good
Very cryptic yet loaded with deep meanings and emotions and also rhyming nicely.
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Thank you. this is one of the ones where I play with silence.
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Very nice write indeed! Well written, with endearing imagery and graceful flow. Thank you so much for your entry & Best wishes in the contest!
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You own the sun,
dance in every drop,
salty and free, love from the start.
Wonderful work
I loved this
The body was so beautiful
It was so full of beauty and wonderment
It was a joy to read
The smoothness was so beautiful
Well done
I was so happy to read this
Good lcuk and thank you for entering this! -
SWEET
You know that I love all that you write. You just have this certain way of wording things. I like it.
POETDONTKNOWIT
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That is special and I am glad you find me special enough to say that.
Love, Tom B.
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I like this, Tom. Sleek and meaningful..nice.
Bun Ez 3
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Yeah, it is. I have learned to be simple without being plain. Also, and you are one of the people I have to thank for this, found that when I am simple I am not always plain. I want to keep the energy, vibrancy of life in my poems. I has taken awhile to see that all I feel can sometimes be best served by the quietest voice.
Thanks.
Love, Tom B. -
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Really love the feel of this...so wonderful sweet.You own the sun, dance in every drop, salty and free, love from the start...When you are present, every moment becomes part of love's forever.This is just breath taking Thank you so much for sharing
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Thanks - I think it is a summing up. I am pleased to hear it touched you so. Love Tom B.
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Well you are certainly not hiding it from the sun anymore lol, this just about sums it up. Love, C
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You try writing one love poem to Matt everyday for thirty days. Make each one unique and different from the ones before. It will open you up, I promise. You will make Bono envious.
Love,Tom B. -
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lol You have a lot of catching up to do, I must be way past thirty
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'I am not a man of shadows.
I face the sun, greet waves
uproariously, love with all my heart'
I am not a man of the shadows, for love I embrace with each new day! Wonderful poem...I think this is by far one of your better ones...~Sie
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Your rendition is not as cliched as mine, but it does not have the gusto I am looking for. This is about my fifth or sixth rendition. I feel special for the compliment is high. Take care. Be Blessed
Love, Tom B.
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