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I Need You



I looked so far
and came so far... my love
just to touch you

standing at the edge
of all we can be
reeling...

falling too far
to ever recover from you
lost in the embers... of loves last flame

 

 


How can I have you
by what cure can I be upon you
and restore my hope...  to love forever

so close I came
to having my finest desire  
that which we dream of as adolescent children

before we learned the truth
before the ruin of reality touches us inside
and binds us from caring... without a thought to ourselves

 

 


Forfeit the truth
and persist blindly as you will
let the anguish of your heart... push thru again

love me tomorrow
like nothing even matters
make that our truth... over the distance

come to me
and let me sin with you
fall with me...  away from the world

 


Come to me again

I need you



LeeL

Author notes

Just making words to win a Contest

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 57 of 57

  • michellemybelle gold member
    November 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    *


  • storiesuntold gold member
    July 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Nice

    A very love revealing poem At a time of innocents when life is at its best

    • Endeavor gold member
      July 11, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Stories


      A few more words, and I could hyave given you ten points... Gee

      Thank you so much for reading this my friend

      Rick


  • Soulful Woman silver member
    July 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    So beautiful a write. The love is felt through all the verses. What a joy to read, as always, my friend.
    Soulful Woman

    • Endeavor gold member
      July 11, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Soulful


      I think you found the feeling in this

      I wanted to add some drive in this, pure passion if I may

      Thank you for saying beautiful, and the 3 bunnies

      Rick


  • SummerlandRayne gold member
    July 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Ahh Rick this was a great love poem...liked this so much~~~"Come to me and let me sin with you." That says a lot in a few words. Such as that love is more important at the time than the mortal soul. Which I have found to be true in my life from time to time. To need one person or one thing so much that nothing else seems to matter. Have gotten myself into a lot of trouble with this one too! But I guess we all just have to follow our crazy hearts from time to time. Great poem!
    Love,
    Azlyn

    • Endeavor gold member
      July 11, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Suzie


      Love can be, or become troubling

      Some women are simply irristable

      These words are for a great woman

      She knows who she is, quite Amazing

      Rick


  • Dragons Lady
    July 3, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful poem. I would love to say more but seem to be at a loss right now.


    • Endeavor gold member
      July 11, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Shadow


      Thank you for reading

      If you ever find the words, come back

      Thank you for saying beautiful

      Rick


  • michellemybelle gold member
    June 20, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    just rereading...simply amazing

    hoping you find the cure and love forever

    • Endeavor gold member
      July 11, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Michelle


      I always feel blessed when you read me again

      I write on the fly, but I edit thru 5-10 readings
      Even I learn on the third and fourth reading

      Thank you for comming back, their is more here than the words

      Love, Rick


  • LadyLeviathan silver member
    June 20, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Wonderful

    thats just beautiful. Amazing Write =]


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Jasmine


      Thank you for reading me

      Thank you for saying Amazing

      Rick


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    June 20, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    ha u knew i would do that, dan wish once i can remmebr to do applauses the first time dang

  • PassionsPromise gold member
    June 20, 2007

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    cant say anything bt, wow.this was awesome wellpened full of powerful emotion. great words coming from a passionate heart. well done rick.
    Much love always
    Tory


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Tory


      Thank you for caring for my words

      Thank you for seeing the passion

      Rick


  • trista gold member
    June 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    hi rick,

    wish i could say more, but i'm not good with hunt and peck typing. lol

    loved this a lot, my favorite part:
    "love me tomorrow
    like nothing even matters
    make that our truth... over the distance"

    cool.
    much love,
    ~J.

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Trista


      Sorry you can only type with one hand

      Sorry I type with 2 out of 10 on a good day

      Welcome to the slow motion world of typing... lol

      Thank you for quoting me

      Rick


  • Talking Toni gold member
    June 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow!!!

    You make me think back to a time when love felt new and innocent and completely possible. Now....I am not sure that love will ever be in the picture for me again!!But back to your poem, this was just lovely!!! It was so gently written it was almost like a lover's lullabye being sung from you to this lovely lady that holds the key to your heart!!! This is the ultimate way of expressing your love to her...love the words "love me like tomorrow doesn't matter" and also "fall with me away from the rest of the world"!!! Great job on this one as always!!!Thanks for sharing!!!~~Toni~~

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Toni


      That time still exisit, it is simply rare

      I am asking no less than that in my words

      I love thoes words as well as they came to me

      Rick


  • Providence
    June 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is just beautiful!....

    falling too far
    to ever recover from you
    lost in the embers... of loves last flame






    How can I have you
    by what cure can I be upon you
    and restore my hope... to love forever

    so close I came
    to having my finest desire
    that which we dream of as adolescent children


    To love as a child...just wonderful!

    Marianne


  • Nicole Cudworth
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my heart... The innocence of love as adolescents is truly what we all are looking for... no games no lies, and certainly all felling. You made my heart want to weep for I know the feeling of needing someone all too well... I am waiting for his call now as a matter of fact...

    come to me
    and let me sin with you
    fall with me... away from the world

    This stanza is perfect! To be able to run away from the world and just be held in contentment with the one who loves you as much as you love them is my idea of perfection...

    Love this poem from you Rick and as always you know just what to say in the form of poetry. Beautifully done.


  • debilynn gold member
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    i think i'm standing on the edge falling. falling. this makes one feel so. your words always touch the heart and soul. falling too far
    to ever recover from you
    lost in the embers... of loves last flame

    breathtaking...thank you for sharing this. keep writing! God bless you alwaysd


  • JoyfulWriter
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Your words always know when to touch and what to touch....simply took me to a precious place to rest my soul...so amazing...so breathtaking...smiles, Terry

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Terry


      When and what is good, In the mind, and in life

      Thank you for saying Amazing, one of my favorite words.. lol

      Rick


  • Endeavor gold member
    June 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Hello


    Has anyone seen my Spelling Fairy

    Has anyone seen my AP Wife... lol


  • Whoochi gold member
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Well hell if this is "just making words" then make on hun, splendid, dreamy and longing, felt like I was free falling with your words...lovely job!

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Sweet Juliz


      Thank you for feeling the longing in my words

      I love this "felt like I was free falling with your words".

      Now that is a great comment for my thoughts in this anguish

      Rick


  • DenyMyLove
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful as always Rick!!!! Maybe in the first verse put 'I looked so far and came even farther...my love just to touch you' One question, at the end of the second verse, did you mean reeling or feeling? These are just my humble opinions!!!! Either way, it's agreat write!!!!
    ~DAWN

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi DAWN


      I avoided farther just for the sound of it read alowed
      The beginging was changed 3 times by me...lol

      I do mean Reeling, as in dizzy, teartering, at the edge.

      Thank you for saying Beautiful. I appreate your thoughts

      Rick


  • Melodies
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Okay... I'll come back...

    Yes, who could resist this wonderful and loving poem? You always do this to us and then we fall over in a heap from the shivers of love! Beautiful writing, dear one!

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Mel


      Thank you for considering comming back my friend

      Come as often as you like to my words... lol

      Thank you for saying Dear One

      Rick


  • poet2angels gold member
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Who could resist this beautiful language of longing???

    "I looked so far
    and came so far... my love
    just to touch you

    standing at the edge
    of all we can be
    reeling...

    falling too far
    to ever recover from you
    lost in the embers... of loves last flame"


    Simply breathtaking my friend....I love this...ONe of your best!

    Lynda


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      PS Linda


      I just saw this

      Thank you for saying, One of my best

      I would love that to be true

      Rick


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Sweet Linda


      Thank you so much for reading me

      I feel honered to be quoted by you

      Thank you for saying Breathtaking

      Rick


  • aurora13 silver member
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    nice one.. liked the lines "before we learned the truth before the ruin of reality touches us inside"


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Auroral13


      Thank you so much for reading me

      That is the "essance" of the focal point of the writing

      Good choise

      Rick


  • RainShadow
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    hmm. I like the message you are getting across here but I think the poem needs a little more work. There were a few spelling errors such as "forfit" should be "forfeit" and "adolesent" should be "adolescent" also "falling to far" should be "falling TOO far" Like I said, a powerful message, but the errors distracted me. good luck :

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Rain


      I made the corrections, I thank you. I have little intrest in details

      Feel the thoughts in the words and see if an E or an A hert you.

      Please read again, and be in the place of the words

      Rick


  • Aurielle
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    awww very sincer and beautiful again, smooth. You speled tomorrow wrong but other then that this poem is very sensaual. Lovely to remember. I also like how you said

    Let us sin together

    nice


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Aurielle


      Thank you for always reading me

      I made the correction, I thank you

      You are kind to say beautiful

      Rick


  • Jalalbad gold member
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    enchanting!

    The need to love and to be loved lies in every person's heart weither they want to believe it or not. smile.
    Judy


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Judy


      Thank you for including your name

      Your words are so true

      Rick

  • michellemybelle gold member
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Dearest Rick,
    my friend, this is a powerful write you have penned here. I felt the anguish and yearning. I think most could relate to,I know I do. Once you feel like a soul mate is found, but for one reason or another, the relationship doesn't work, how do you let go?
    Amazing write and good luck in this contest.
    much love and happiness to you,
    Michelle

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Sweet Michelle


      Thank you for feeling my words so well

      We are compelled to begine sometimes
      even if we fear the ending

      Thank you for wishing me happyness

      Rick


  • kaida-nariko
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    im having this happrn to me right now. i know ow this feels. and how hard it is. i especially lived this part

    "love me tommrow
    like nothing even matters
    make that our truth... over the distance

    come to me
    and let me sin with you
    fall with me... away from the world




    Come to me again

    I need you"

    i actually just wrote a poem simalar to this...

    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Kaida


      I read your verse, I feel for your plight

      Thank you for caring for my words

      Love is the best and worst of our lives

      Rick


  • Hidden Fortress
    June 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    wow...

    I love this I love this! You put the feelings in my heart for my beloved on paper in a way I could never... It is amazing... thank you so much for writing this!


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hidden


      Thank you for loving my words

      That is a great complement

      Rick


  • SandraMVeinot
    June 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    words are always in the making....

    distant yet never far away....

    like tears...

    thanks for the endused thoughts here....

    good luck in the contest....


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Sandra


      Thank you for the kind words of luck

      Let me know what you think

      Rick


      • SandraMVeinot
        June 18, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        and you are welcome..and I would like to thank you for your kind thoughts at this time in my life...


  • Dragons Lady
    June 14, 2007
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    Waiting for the words


  • Whoochi gold member
    June 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    can't wait


    • Endeavor gold member
      June 12, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Julez


      Hearing your story
      will help me find the words

      In the end, our best blessings are yet unknown

      Rick

1 - 57 of 57