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~ Whispers~

I remain silent held hostage in the tainted
remnants of yesterday,
When you left  my lips frozen between syllables,
My thoughts waltzing through echoes
of framed confusion,
As you told me this was our final good-bye,
Where any protest would have been
spoken in vain,
Instead I stared my eyes shimmering in silence
masked in silken wishes of retreat,
And In layered consciousness
I remembered that one summer our hearts afire,
dreaming love to life,
Lost within your eyes of forbidden burst of blue
where hearts don't lie,
Now you exist only in dreams as stars softly fade,
And I am nothing more then another petal down,
As today became yesterdays whispers of love.

Author notes

Option one /word phrase
In order used.
Tainted remnants of yesterday, frozen between syllables,
waltzing through echoes, framed confusion,
spoken in vain, shimmering in silence, in silken wishes,
layered consciousness, hearts afire, dreaming love to life,
forbidden burst of blue, hearts don't lie,
Only in dreams, as stars softly fade, petal down.

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • silent.insanity
    January 10
    Edit | Reply
    that is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!


  • DolphinLass silver member
    July 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    congrats well written


  • PerfectImperfection
    June 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice use of the phrase bank here. You have created a piece of longing amongst the wreckage of love; lovely piece. Thank you for your entry & Best wishes in the contest!

  • -lk-
    June 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow!!!

    What a stunner this is You have taken the word phrases and with your special gift of creativity really made a specatular poem!

    I loved every word of this and had to go back several times and just drink in the beauty of this one my friend

    Best wishes and already a winner in my book.

    Warmest blessings!


  • Arkbear gold member
    June 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Oh My ~

    Each line was so thought provoking Hun ~

     

    I have found your writings to be taking on a

    different color as of late ~

     

    You are becoming very artistic with

    these *Banks*

     

    Such wonderful structure ~

     

    Presentation is Superb ~

     

    Theme is unique ~

     

    Love it all ~

     

    I could have cut & pasted the parts I liked

    the best....but it would be the whole write ~

     

    The best to you in this contest ~

     

    Bear ~


  • Sandygram
    June 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Very Creative!!!

    Wow Tearz, you have penned a very lovely and heartfelt poem. I enjoyed reading this morning. . You have penned some amazing imagery. You take care, Sandy

    Best of luck in the contest, it should do very well.


  • The Fallen Phoenix
    June 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This is so poignant. I love it.


  • Roaddog Wolf
    June 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    nicely written

    you have some very nice imagery and word usage in this penning "masked in silken wishes of retreat",and "Lost within your eyes of forbidden burst of blue". I liked those the most very nice.


  • poet2angels gold member
    June 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    beautiful!

    What a beautiful poem!
    You have made excellent use of the phrase bank...Actually you cannot even tell that one was used. It flows naturally, and the imagery is wonderful!

    Lynda


  • Malabu
    June 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    wow girl

    this is one of your best ive read in a while.....speaks clearly and decisively daunting...and as the willows branches weep the heart of her sings a love song......forever tears
    Love the writing and the words penned from heart
    Mal


  • azure85 gold member
    June 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Such a poem, filled with supplied words from a word bank, you have crafted a bittersweet poem of first love. The heart's cry speaks out in this one, as the poem reflects back on the love that once was.

    layered consciousness, hearts afire, dreaming love to life,
    forbidden burst of blue, hearts don't lie,
    Only in dreams, as stars softly fade, petal down.

    This is so good, it pulls at the strings of the reader's heart, O Wonderful Poet.

  • Mercury Rising
    June 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You've performed a feat of poetic magic weaving these phrases deftly together into a wonderful tapestry.
    A really terrific read. Best of luck in your contest!

    David


  • Legend silver member
    June 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Absolutely magical I need say no more,

    I LOVE IT

1 - 13 of 13