I said I cared and she hid
I said,"I love you" and she ran
She said "I love you, too"
Finally a smile
for us both
A contest entry
- Another Five Lines or Less by Heavenly Angel.
750 points, ended June 20, 2007, 26 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 32 of 32
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This is something sweet,
and you are lucky to find
one willing to give
the same three words back.
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Empusa, It feels good to say it but even better knowing it's returned
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then you are lucky.
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very much so and it can happen for you, too
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they have found
the rabbit hole
and have gone underground
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Awww! I'm glad I stumbled upon this. This is so sweet and cute. Short poems can have such a powefrul meaning. And you portrayed this very well here. Keep Writing!
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Mahogany, this is the shortest I've ever wriiten and if you're ready for some 'heat, check out the kinky tales of the Satyr
the Satyr
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Congrats on Bronze, Nice job!
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Malicai, many thanks for the kudos. And, welcome to the world of the Satyr. Hope you drop by for a little tingle when you check out my other stories
teh Satyr
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This is delightful! Made me smile ... congrats on the sunny bronze trophy!
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bethan, it always feels good to share a smile with someone as lovely as you. Most of stories here might be offensive to you so I suggest you check out the other me at 'mitimse' also here on A/P
the satyr
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I ilke it
I personally like shorter poetry i like the way it cuts straight to the point. I like the progress to a nice end.
good poem
regards
Perdix
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perdix, thanks for the read and the nice compliment. to see the better side of my prose, you can find me at 'mitimse' here on A/P
the Satyr
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It's sweet and something of a youthful innocents or rather soft ignorance that makes it simple and unique. Lovely
~Se
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Greenie, sometimes its nice to act like a kid and keep it simple
teh Satyr
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Beautiful Write
I have been neglecting yoou so I had to come and check up on you I love this write she said I love you and she ran sorta had humor _hugs_ -
The emotions that run within this are ones that hit home. Love is a very special thing that should not be thrown around lightly. Perhaps the running shoes help with the contemplation of its magnitude.
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this is really sweet. i wish you all the best in your relationship and in the contest.
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Shimmer, it will take time and patience Iknow but in the end, things will be just the way they're supposed to be
the Satyr
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this is so short yet it has an amazing impact on the reader... i hope your smiles lasts for ever...
cheers
jen
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slipper, I hope it lasts forever, too. It's been a long time cuming/coming
teh Satyr
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this makes me smile. that means progress is being made
i know you wrote this with true intentions of the heart but i also wanted to say best of luck in the contest. be well and be blessed
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Avalon, It's not about the contest. It was just that the timing was write and I had a feeling I needed to share with you all
the Satyr
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Awwwwwwwwwwww how sweet, I wish you the most joy I can within your new found love.
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myJoy, it might seem that I'm getting musshy and in some ways I am. But the Satry will always be the Satyr
the Satyr
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Beautifully displayed forever growing days.
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thanks for the read Mr dreams--I hope it continues to grow as well
the Satyr
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Very nicely done!
It's awesome when the feelings you feel for someone are returned
I wish you the best in this contest and with the new relationship
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Heavenly, it's not so much about the contest--I felt free enought to say it and I hope it keeps getting better
teh Satyr
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