Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Pretty Little Killer

Can you remember a boy you used to know
The boy who came the boy you let go
He gave you his heart that you could keep
So you took it and you laid him to sleep
He gave you love you betrayed his trust
You pretty little killer took him from us

He was someone with a soul so pure
But as soon as he met you he wasn’t anymore
I a single night his heart was shook
From a kiss and a touch and a single look

The stars that were faded in the city sky
Appeared as clear as crystal in his eyes
But for you he chose to leave them all behind
And allow him self to almost go blind

Can you remember a boy you used to know
The boy who came the boy you let go
He gave you his heart that you could keep
So you took it and you laid him to sleep
He gave you love you betrayed his trust
You pretty little killer took him from us

Even though the boy as come and pass
We will make sure the deed of it does last
It was under your love that he became broke
It should’ve been your hands that made him choke

He would have given you everything
From little candy hearts to big golden rings
But you didn’t want the heart under the skin
So destroyed the mind that held him in

Can you remember a boy you used to know
The boy who came the boy you let go
He gave you his heart that you could keep
So you took it and you laid him to sleep
He gave you love you betrayed his trust
You pretty little killer took him from us

The main thing that really does mystify
Is how throughout this you don’t cry
It is like you don’t even care
Almost like you’re the reason he isn’t there

Can you remember a boy you used to know
The boy who came the boy you let go
He gave you his heart that you could keep
So you took it and you laid him to sleep
He gave you love you betrayed his trust
You pretty little killer took him from us

Author notes

Option 4 Miss Murder

Lady Nightshade

When you find yourself in a hole, STOP DIGGING!!!

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Ryno
    December 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think that the message spoke out to many people here - and many were able to relate to the strong emotions and the reality of it.

    I don't think the rhyming or the form was well done. It didn't flow very well for me - and I also thought you could've used more creative phrasing and some imagery.

    Well done, though, thanks for the entry.


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    June 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This kind of broke me... It's almost shocked me how my behaviour can be a little like this and I DONT want that kind of thing to happen. Thank you for helping me open up my eyes in such a way, I have been cruel and yet I do not wish real harm on others, I just want to feel love myself in a twisted way. Thanks for entering my contest.


  • SarahEatsAirplane
    June 22, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I like it. it made me think about relationships, and how someone may love the other, but the loved one doesnt love the other. It is so unfair..

    good job.


  • LucyLightning
    June 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Like I've said before with this poem, it practically screams amazing. lol. Good luck in this contest.


  • AshliiAsphyxiation
    June 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    please read the whole page, i hide the rules everywere to make sure it is read.

    xoo


  • ThnxsForTheMmrs-x-
    June 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    "Even though the boy as come and pass
    We will make sure the deed of it does last
    It was under your love that he became broke
    It should’ve been your hands that made him choke

    He would have given you everything
    From little candy hearts to big golden rings
    But you didn’t want the heart under the skin
    So destroyed the mind that held him in"

    ok there is so much., so so so ,uch that i want to say about this one but i just can't this poem this dreaded amazing, over powering, beautful wirte has taken me back to a place not too fare away that i never wanted to think of again. i feel as though this was writen directally too me, and it is almost, no it is really scaryyy!!!!

    But my dear this was perfection non the less

    thank you sooooo much..

    much love and good luck kaydeee


  • LucyLightning
    June 10, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    wow. talk about effing amazing. This whole entire poem just SCREAMMMMMMMMMMMMMED amazing. loveddddd it.


  • KittieLyyn
    June 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    amazing. beautiful. loved this part.

    He was someone with a soul so pure
    But as soon as he met you he wasn’t anymore
    I a single night his heart was shook
    From a kiss and a touch and a single look

    The stars that were faded in the city sky
    Appeared as clear as crystal in his eyes
    But for you he chose to leave them all behind
    And allow him self to almost go blind

    great job good luck

1 - 8 of 8