His soul is still inside him.
As he softly breathes.
Where did he come from?
Where will he go?
Is there a time that this gentle soul will wake up?
How is he breathing?
Sleeping Beauty, we shall call him.
Wake up handsome, wake up handsome.
We are the spirits of love.
Let us guide you with in this realm.
Shhhh, we can't say where we are because
we too shall be banished into another
world.
Come Sleeping Beauty and play a game.
All we need is your soul, spirit, and mind.
Leave your outer shell behind.
Come before Death falls upon us.
Yvonne J. Griffin
6/6/07
Author notes
Watery Grave / by Sunyata - had an excellent concept which kept me involved from beginning to end...
yvonne
A contest entry
- PICTURE INSPIRED by Arkbear.
300 points, ended June 28, 2007, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Oh, this weaves from somewhere concrete to the ethereal. It is a little different from your usual pieces. When I say usual, I do not mean 'common'. It is just that we all have a signature when we write. I just thought of this having said that. It would be difficult to forge any of us because we have a signature. As a poet scientist, I would have a harder time placing this in your collection if I just read it by itself not knowing it was you. The idea behind it could lead anywhere as an outside reader. It conjured up so many pictures for me from the writer's point of view. did not look at the picture and that is even better, because I will maintain my own ideas about the write. Great job. Be well my friend and sis. RC
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Nice one, alittle different from what i'm used to from you but good never-the-less...
good luck in contest.
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Powerful piece. Good luck in the contest
Thanks for your comment
Pozo
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A lovely write. Good flow and tone. Lovely depth of feeling. I like the softness like being written in a whisper. Good word choice, alliteration and assonance. I like the repetition of 'wake up handsome'... there is a dreamlike quality to this piece. A much enjoyed read.
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this is very good reminds me of a fantasy write, on a certain level. loved the subtle rhyme and the repeat of 'wake up handsome', the flow was very nice as well. very nice imagery here to follow.
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