Silently standing
Surrounded yet so alone
Thorn amidst roses
Author notes
k so option numero 5:
aliens or alienation
A contest entry
- I am starting a family!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! by angel of the dead.
300 points, ended February 15, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A is for... by Pandorea.
800 points, ended April 15, 2008, 11 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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wow. i love how you used the haiku form and sitll managed to produce something meaningful. and inverting the "rose among the thorns" for the last line was really effective.
thanks for entering. -
good alliteration used here, though s is a tricky one to speak aloud, especially if you have a lisp lol a good poem
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it is okay need to finnsh thou...sorry if i came in to soon...ummmmm...in your Authors Note please put wat you want to be....ummmm and sweet so far...if you need help righting poem go look at mine and see how they can help you or ask me and i will love to help you ...
please fix what i asked for cuz next time i come in here i will be booting people out!
Thanks,
Monica
AKA
~Lil Ma'
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umm... I couldn't fix anything because I wasn't able to get on my computer.... buh even though I couldn't get on my computer there's nothing to fix. It's a haiku, so it's only supposed to be three lines with the syllable numbers being 5,7,5. So if I made it any longer, it would no longer be a haiku.
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great i need your name!!!!
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It's Joanna
mostly Jo... or joey.
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Very entertaining! I think its great. What a wonderful poem!
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thank you for entering what family member might you be interested in?
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ahh... I was thinking sister.. best friend would be good too
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not bad for your first haiku ^^ simple yet nicely done. the last line was my fave, btw
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Very well done. Strong and meaningful in it's brevity. No words wasted and makes you think about your own life and how easy it is to feel so lonely even in a room full of people. The last line is wonderful, showing how different one is.
Lovely work.
Best!
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Yes, it is okay....good in fact. I don't know the rules for this form, but the simpleness and message are well done.
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