Theres a tear held in murky glass.
The yawning expanse of a great divide.
Conversation reached an impasse.
Then ventured forth without it's pride
I wonder now, who goes there still.
If their tread leaves footprints in the dust.
The shambling gait of one stranger ill.
Chewing the crumbs off a lifeless crust.
From scrabbling hands, choices were taken
and masqueraded about as rusty charms.
Silouhettes of the now forsaken
Holding consequences in their wispy arms.
Captured in verisimilitude
Water shapes channels for smiles deserting
Embittered haven of perceptions skewed
Sickly sweet cry of a heart decaying
A contest entry
- Love by butterflytears.
450 points, ended June 20, 2007, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I challenge you by Ilma.
800 points, ended August 2, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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beautiful piece it's awesome
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oh wow. i'd like to see the work lost somewhere in your thoughts if this is wat u can produce on paper! ... luvly piece. seriously
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Outstanding
This is full of sadness. You dealt with a sensitive subject in a way that draws the readers attention in a hopeless and difficult situatin. I thought this was expressive with a vivid picture and sense of depth and integrity. Very well written.
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Very good, the language you used was flawless and you express yourself very well indeed, a very sad poem, I loved it, best of luck
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great vocabulary.. flawless expression.. awesome poetry kudos!
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This tells of such sad love, makes you want to cry. I hope it is not biographical for I would want to hand you a tissue and a
Love, C
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Such sorrow in the words of this. Great flow and vocabulary in here. This is supreme poetry my friend
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deep!
you are such a talented writer...no mattert what you write about, it always turns out beautiful...
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its a good write. good luck in the contes
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Wow
Such sorrow so passionately penned.
Good Luck friend...
xxx
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Thanks my baby
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Heart breaking.
A very deep and heart felt poem of love lost.
The images are very vivid.
You know where I am....
All the best...Sue
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This is a beautiful and profound piece. I love the rhyme scheme, it never seemed forced, and the imagery is very powerful. Well done, this is excellent, keep writing! xoxo
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wow really gud babe///how u doin?
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