*
When time speeds so fast,
that it's not even a blur.
You try to scrutinize,
but can't even recognize....
I thought that I'd gone,
off my stable rocker,
Like a certification,
for no concentration.
Thoughts like that kept,
flowing through my head.
My ability to learn,
was taking a burn.
At a time I could choke,
the seventh bell started to chime.
It was the dark before my wake,
I took a leap for sanity's sake.
*
Author notes
By RIP Whoever. 12.
Title Option: Fortunately Sane
A contest entry
- Ages 13 and Under Only ~ Pick a Title and Roll With it 2 by Amunet Wolfbane.
450 points, ended June 14, 2007, 15 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
You have write this well. The flow is nicely done with the exception of the little hiccup, sort of speak with the period in the second stanza. I think a comma may work much better for the flow. Great Job!
Blessings
celticmoon
-
I thought that I'd gone,
off my stable rocker.
Like a certification,
for no concentration.
By removing the period in line two the flow will move better
Score: 92
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