I am NEVER Superstitious – A Non-Entry.
I am NEVER superstitious – don’t believe in all that rot -
all my faith is firmly rooted in God’s Will.
By relying on His guidance, I have got where I have got
with few injuries and seldom had a spill.
I think that those who’re credulous regarding superstition
show an ignorance that borders on the nauseous.
Perhaps I should explain to you my resolute position
which is simply that of always being cautious.
So I don’t walk under ladders lest some fellow up above
well might slip and lose his footing on the rung
and I never found a four-leaf clover brought me luck or love
(though I tried hard in the days when I was young.)
Why say black cats are evil when we know that ALL cats are?
If I cross my fingers, how can I keep writing?
And of COURSE it’s bad luck if you hit a white horse with your car,
while, to step on cracks, an ankle-sprain’s inviting,
Who is mad enough to open an umbrella when inside
or to bruise their knuckles knocking them on wood?
How can carrying a rabbit’s foot give any sense of pride
or blowing birthday candles make luck good?
It’s ridiculous to think that when my left or right hand itches
or a twitching nose or eyelid has some meaning
that portends a gain or worse, a loss, in monetary riches.
I believe to sheer insanity that’s leaning.
And as for wishing-wells or throwing coins into a fountain,
or wishing when you see a falling star,
or thinking prayers are better heard when said atop a mountain,
like breaking wishbones, all has gone too far.
I don’t throw spilled salt behind me, coz it messes up the floors
and a broken mirror’s caused me no bad luck.
If a Friday is the thirteenth I won’t cower all day indoors -
I think all those superstitious sayings suck.
It's quite untrue to say that everything will come in THREE’s.
God gave us all two eyes, two ears, two arms, hands, feet and knees!
PS:
Please DON’T tell Shewolf that, in voodoo dolls, I don’t believe
or she’ll stick mine with those nasty pins that she keeps up her sleeve!
Hugh (R.) June 1st. 2007.
Author notes
Started as a sonnet (for Margaret) but got a bit carried away!
In a list
A contest entry
- FOR HUGH WYLES FAVOURITES GROUP ONLY # 13 by huguenauties.
750 points, ended June 13, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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I do believe you got them all!
They fit together as in the original from which later, they disperse.
But black cats, the kind with luminous eyes in the dark are magical even when they share lodgings with us. I have two, totally black, one with green eyes, the other with amber or we'd never be able to tell which is which. Gentle, quiet, often asleep in identical positions, they earn their keep as mousers...not an evil hair upon them.
Lovely poem!
Terry
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Um...erm..... did you think my poem bordered on something ungodly? When I speak of the Unvierse.... it is another way to name God for me...
dangit, now I gunna cry. (I sat on one of my own pins) -
Lol... You brought a smile and some giggles with this humorous piece, Hugh... but what's this about hating all cats????!!!!! You can't do that, they have nine lives and each one will come back just to make your life miserable and then in the end, after that final life is gone, they'll come back to haunt you. Best you have a quick change of heart, Hugh... or bar your doors and windows and never plan on setting foot outdoors ever again.
Um, sorry, guess I got a bit carried away there.
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Dear Dee,
Who said anything about HATING cats? Not me!!
I just said that they are EVIL. They hide behind bushes in our garden when I'm feeding my birdies and when I go inside and the birds come, those evil cats charge out and, even though they hardly ever catch one, they scare the birds away.
Cats are TERRORISTS! What's worse is when they DO catch one, they play with it for hours till it's dead and then pull it to bits (unless I catch them at it and free the bird - in which case I get the evil eye and the most unimaginably malevolent glower)
Only FLUFFY is free of sin because she is an angel-cat.
Love and hugs, XXX Hugh (R.)
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Dear Babe,
OOHH! I am sooo superstitious sometimes!
Heath is always teasing me about it!
Very good poem with heaps of good advise about not being superstitious.
Love Hine.
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Dear Hugh,
I don't think black cat's are evil or unlucky. In fact I seem to have good luck when one runs in front of me. HONEST INJUN!
And I confess that some of the superstitions on your list I do believe.
Bonza poem my Friend. I enjoyed reading your views on superstitions.
Love Jen.
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Dear Hugh,
I enjoyed your poem and agree that superstitions are silly BUT I can't agree that cats are evil. I love my two cats..they may not bring me my slippers but they comfort me and make me feel good! I know you like cats, too, and just wanted to be funny, right?
Love and Hugs,
Maureen
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Dear Hugh...
What is this nonsense about ALL cats being evil???!!!
What a terrible thing to say! I have TWO black cats and several others of mismatched colors, I'll have you know. And they have never brought me bad luck.......then again.......maybe that's why my life has turned out the way it has??? 
Hum...me thinks I might have to reconsider my feelings about cats. 
I love the poem, Hugh.
It brought a smile to my face, and that is not an easy feat these days.
Love ands
~J.
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The poems that are the most fun to read are those where people get carried away. Form and funny don't seem to mix...now I'll wait while people try to contradict me...but they cannot because I am GOD and I know all! Sorry, I should never drink Moxie before 6 am!
If I am superstitious and I step on a crack, am I thus obligated to break my mother's back? And if so, and I do, am I liable under the law? I think if my attorney uses the "determinism Defense" I should be set free. After-all, under such cases I have no Free Will and am obligated to follow, to its logical conclusion, all such superstitions which, as we all know are 100% accurate (which doesn't make them superstitions but in fact, a priori events.
Yes, I should never drink Moxie this early in the morning.
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Dear Yem,
What do you mean "Form and funny don't seem to mix"?
Haven't you read ANY of my papers (poems) about boobs???
(Well, I spose it all depends on your sense of humour but I thought they were at least a little bit ticklish.)
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It's the thought that counts, even if ideas are too abundant to be contained in a short form.
Some proverbs about luck are simply common-sense, as you say. I learned to give construction sites wide berth, after my best jacket was spattered by falling paint - that goes for ladders and lifting equipment too.
Your verse is lightly humorous and fun to read. Thanks for your non-entry!
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Dear Margaret,
Don't forget it's now traditional for the hostess to provide a non-entry. I like the thought of you on a construction site. Don't forget your helmet!
Love and hugs and thanks for your applause. XXX Hugh (R.)
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Oh Hugh
You are quite amazing and of course hilarious.
Thanks for this ditty of magnified proportions.
Non -
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Dear Non,
Really? Why,thankyou!
Please give may love and hugs to Jan,
who's musing in her caravan?
XXX Hugh.
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Dear Hugh,
You've covered quite a lot on superstitions.
There are still some to be named, but not sure what I'll write about yet.
Oh my! wouldn't shewolfnative have fun with you with all those pins.
Give it to him Carol! stick them where it hurts!
A fantastic poem my friend. Hope you've put the horseshoe up the right way!
love Bea
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Dear Bea,
Thankyou for your comment and applaue.
Did I ever tell you that my maternal grandfather hoarded horseshoes for years, convinced that motorcars were just a passing craze?
I wonder what he would think if he could see all the dealers' and used-car sales yards and the constant nose-to-tail traffic congestion on our roads today!
Love and hugs, XXX Hugh.
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