Shimmering open
Kaleidoscope of colors
Yields not to darkness
Author notes
This is an Acrostic and a Haiku.
(AA)
In a list
Comments
1 - 31 of 31
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truly you have defined the sunrise in the sky in short prose poetic form. beautifully written and i love your words. very lovely!
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I really like the idea of acronyms. Flawless description of the sky. Although the colors eventually slip away and the dark night sky comes, the memory of such beauty never yeilds, and it comes back again just as beautiful, and also unique, ai, in the morning for another rise, then at dusk again.
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beautiful
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wow glad you highlighted the words even though they still somewhat blurr into the background. Very nice three lines, wish there had been more to it but yeah ok this will do
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lol, if there was more it would not be an acrostic for the word "sky"... nor would it be an attempt at a haiku... XP
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I think this piece said a lot. I can't understand Haiku's so can't make any judgment on this area, not that i would anyway, cause its not called for. Love the background to this piece and even though so small in write, it said everything about such a wonderful view...not sure whether that is sunrise or sunset...(silly me). Great write.
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glad you liked it hun!
but fyi: a sunset would yield to darkness, a sunrise would not
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Interesting acrostic/haiku combination. Though it is three lines... it isn't a haiku in set up. A haiku really needs the phrase/fragment structure to work out well. It needs two subjects...... one in contrast or "ah-haa" to the other... a sudden revelation.... you see. You should carry deeper resonance in meaning and generally reference a season either directly or by association of the subject.
I enjoyed the read.... and you have talent. I think you ought to sign up for beginning haiku class with Myron.... he is an excellent poet and will help you a lot.
Thanks for a heads up on this one... hope this comment helps you out.
many blessings,
Don
Monk
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Beautiful haiku! My it's been a while since I've read one... well done..
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wow
this is great! How clever! Wonderful way with words! I like the combination of visual, sound and meaning and emotion.
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This was quite interesting. I had never heard of Haiku before, but seeing this, I now understand. It is very clever using the word sky as as a jump off. I love the background. It all sits together nicely.
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I have never been a fan of haiku. But this one is different. I love how you made it an acrostic too, and you actually use words that paint a picture, even though there's only nine.
Thanks so much for entering. -
I love the acrostic for this haiku. Very nicely done. The imagery created in your words and the background flow together so naturally. Sunrise and sunset are my favorite times of day. Especially in the mountains. this is really quite lovely. Thank you for sharing.
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Beautifully caught, small is also beautiful.
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Shimmering open,
as i am not really a great fan of haiku forms, i can still enjoy this for the sheer image it produces, as Don Juan said dusk and dawn are the cracks between worlds, alike when lights length would lend itself to the minds will, and the aura would be most visible, anyheys nice write here, THANKS FOR SHARING, w antipesto and orange juice -jas -
Beautiful poem. I don't know much about haiku's.
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Perfect. Well done. I loved it!
Jin
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I like this one. Short and sweet. The power behind those few words says it all. Keep that pen flowing. You sure done a grand job. With fewer words it becomes harder to carry a powerful thought but it carries more power when written.
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nice job. Haiku is one of the best forms of poetry there is! lol. nice write. keep it up!
Crimson -
This is a great hiaku!!!! I am the ultimate fan of hiakus and this one is just great. Nice!!!!
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Very Nice
So short yet nothing more needs to be said for it is truly perfect
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Wow beautiful poem and background. NIce job with imagery.
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i couldnt stop reading it because it was so good and short
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I love the writting and the way you said it. short and sweet is what i say like great job and keep up the great work!!!!!=)Hope to be seeing more of those poems
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great and beautiful wonderful work
keep on writing
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Fits the acrostic perfectly. Without a doubt this is a wonderful blend of the two forms. The background really highlights the poem also. Well done!
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And the cracks and pathways between worlds present the eye for our soul to light all the night with love and so the mandala of the infinite
your world is beautiful
i thank you with all
(o and some magic mushrooms)
-JAS
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Brilliantly worded. The background is exceptional too. You captured the sunrise in the sky beautifully.
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Wow... impressive.... As if one wasn't hard enough. Good stuff!
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Not many people can write in two forms with one poem. This was excellent. I can't wait to read your other enteries
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I love that you hit two birds with one stone by using two forms, that was very creative! You did an excellent job. The syllable count is perfect and you used two very hard forms to follow by and blended the, together. I will except this as two poems because not many people can write one poem in two forms. You have blown me away with this and I can not wait to read what else you have! I give you a perfect 10!
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