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craft


    rock

pressed in ancient beds of granite, slate and limestone,
         latent meaning morphs through dreamless sleep,
   eventually to break the rolling waves and rise
      from out the heavy hollows of the deep.

            eons steadily reveal
   frameworks laid beneath the ground,
         raw potentials long concealed.

rugged hands reflect on broken bits of earth,
         weathered through millenniums of doubt,
   and dimly sense potentials waiting undiscerned,
      conceptions to be learned and reasoned out.

            soon flames are tamed in hearthstone mounds,
   grains are pounded into meal,
         and slings are armed with small gray rounds.


    artifacts

barrows seal the homes where bones return to dust;
         dolmens house the disembodied dead—
   expressions raised to honor dear departed blood,
      conveyed throughout millenniums of dread.

            boundaries birth a web of walls,
   stretched throughout diverse terrain,
         enclosing keeps and township halls.

hallowed chambers echo whispers, murmured rites.
         columns vault gray shadows to a haze,
   and effigies defy the cruelties of time
      amid the slow decline of ancient ways.

            castles rise on golden plains
   and mountain palaces enthrall
         ridge tops in the sunset's wane.


    trace

ages past are carved and mortared into place,
         stacked against the ravages of wear,
   impressions left to echo long forgotten days
      across the centuries of grueling care.

            quarries reach through hidden lodes
   for raw materials to build
         nascent hopes and strong abodes.

waters feed the ducts of resolute invention,
         wind buffets walls of praise and grave regret,
   towers guard their gates from sinister intention,
      bridges keystone over streams and vales. and yet

            each rigid monument of skill
   brick by stone in time erodes,
         erasing every act of will.

 

 

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Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • MoonLady silver member
    March 7
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    Strong Primeval Images

    As always, your poems are a constant inspiration for my own writing. I like the primeval images and feeling of ancient connection with the natural world. Rhiannan


  • Ladybug
    January 7
    Edit | Reply
    this is full of information on tar,stone and rubber how it is ground to represent the tall buildings like castle to be used again. good ole recycle always win.

    great meter and metaphor used here

    keep writing till the pen is out of ink

    Tamara

    . Rewarded 4


  • Voximation
    November 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is full of wonderful imagery. I enjoyed reading it very much you have much talent =) Keep on penning, i hope to see more of your work in the future.
    --Vox

  • antichrist
    October 29, 2007

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    every verse was like candy...you use so much imagery in such a condensed space!! "break the rolling waves and rise from out the heavy hollows of the deep." it can get no better.... * I was wondering if the last word "tam" was suppose to be "tame." (just wondering) Any who I not only fell in love with your style of writing, but you formatting is utter perfection! beautiful write, and thank you for sharing!! keep the pen flowing!!! *rose*

  • Dragons Lady
    August 19, 2007
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    A wonderfully interesting poem. I read your reply to liz. With that in mind I read it again. I loved your use of the metaphors. Enjoyable reading. Well done

    . Rewarded 4


  • exalted
    July 8, 2007

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    wow, how interesting... i can tell that a lot of thought was put into this. i am not familiar with this rhyme scheme but it seems you have done an excellent job. my favorite aspect of this is the vocabulary you have woven into this story. i think the last few stanzas are the strongest. i noticed you catagorized this under "allegory" and i'm pretty sure i get it... but would you mind explaining the complete metaphor for this, if there is one?

    . Rewarded 8


    • Zahhar gold member
      July 8, 2007
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      hi liz.

      the entire poem is intended to be allegorical of the history and process of poetry itself. 'rock' is the word, each word a stone. 'artifacts' are the syntactic units, lines, and stanzas of poetry. and 'trace' is the process of creation and, eventually, no matter how long we humans linger here, the utmost end of poetry. if you have any further thoughts with this in mind, i'll be curious to hear them.
  • Dream Drifter
    June 29, 2007

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    'craft'
    'barrows seal the homes where bones return to dust;'

    that says how i feel most of the time.

    but as far as the poem goes it was really well writen and very wide in vision.

    i thank you for creating this read.

  • myrataal silver member
    June 14, 2007
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    Almost somber ... yet vivid ...

    in its recollection of fact and artifact, crafted into every trace of life displayed; (selection of) musings with yearrings merged in stone and soul ...

    I wonder whether the exit lines could not read:



    rigid in each monument of skill
    brick by stone in time erodes
    every wistful act of will


    Love
    Myra

    . Rewarded 6


  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    May 30, 2007
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    I am constantly amazed and wondering where your spotlight will shine next.
    Your poetry covers such a range of topics and illuminates interesting aspects each time.
    Keep up the good work.

    . Rewarded 4


    • Zahhar gold member
      May 30, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      your words are a boost to my moral. thank you.

  • CountryCousin
    May 29, 2007
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    An interesting poem.

    This is the first time that I have read this style and found it to be very unique and interesting. I like that in poetry. The poem sounded like one of the epic pieces written by a true bard.

    . Rewarded 4


    • Zahhar gold member
      May 30, 2007
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      thanks CC. this is an interesting and unique form to write in. hopefully one day i'll grow into it.

  • Angel Goddess
    May 29, 2007

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    I love this piece and how it tells a story. You have discovery, learning, and evolution in the first section. Then next is death and decay. The last bit brings about discovery of the people from the part one. It's like a circle that never ends. I really enjoyed reading this piece (even though I had to look up a few of the words, lol). Great job, even though you don't need me to tell you that.
    Nicole

    . Rewarded 8


    • Zahhar gold member
      May 30, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      AG, i really appreciate your taking the time to give me a look into your interpretive process as a reader. thank you.

      • Angel Goddess
        May 31, 2007
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        It was truly no problem. I don't think I've ever read anything you've written that didn't evoke some sort of response.
  • Kay Laon Anders
    May 29, 2007

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    Stairs

    I love stairs....lol


    I think of climbing when I read this....Like someone is building their own stairway..build a step and step up build a step and step up and so on...I like the word craft...maybe it's because it was my favorite thing to do when little besides run around outside..making something of your very own is a beautiful thing...It might look unfinished to others or maybe a little rough around the edges but if the crafter thinks his craft is finished I say it's finished..."brick by stone in time erodes"......very true...another great write...read your notes in a bit..


    Kay LAON aNDErs

    . Rewarded 8


    • Zahhar gold member
      May 30, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      i love the fresh thoughtful honesty of your comments, kaylers. glad you enjoyed this piece. and i'm doubly glad you were willing to share your interpretive process with me.
      • Kay Laon Anders
        May 31, 2007
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        dude....

        You took up like a whole page with the 4 star 5 star thing ...lol My eyes were swirling by the time I got to the bottom...I had to smack myself to make it stop....lol

        "fresh thoughtful honesty..."? not quite... I realized about 2 years ago that I had a different way of reading than most...I can see images and characters in my mind when I read a book or a poem and for a long while i thought others could also because it came so natural to me...but some actually have quite a difficult time reading anything because they can't see what they are reading...and of course i could never share my "honest insight" of what images come into my head with a lot of this philosophy mumbo jumbo that i read now and then...I would offend someone majorly...

        lol


        Kay
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