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And the Tale Went Like This



contemplative daydreamed glory
injected hero's story
masturbative masterpieces
rejected parts of master thesis

circumcision is required
cuts are most desired
incision into chapter
guts of the adapter

elusive is the praise
given throught he haze
reclusive in the editor
driven by the preditor

expanding of the dialogue
begins the final monolog
repremanding the obscurity
weakens the security

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

A Lunar Chant
Created by:Luna Tique Fringe


Four 4 line stanzas
with both begining line rhyme
and end line rhyme

front rhyme:
ABAB,CDCD,EFEF,GHGH

end rhyme:
aabb,ccdd,eeff,gghh

A word bank that birthed a new form.
Inspiration by my amusing muse, Sheltered.



A contest entry

the form

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 39 of 39

  • Shattered Remains
    October 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Sorry about the triple comment, Analyze-minds is another account I have on here for a different style of writting I do, I was logged in with the wrong one when I started this..


  • Shattered Remains
    October 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Interesting poem, definately an original.... I enjoyed the read, thanks for entering...


  • Shattered Remains
    October 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Interesting poem, definately an original.... I enjoyed the read, thanks for entering...


  • Analyze-Minds
    October 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Interesting poem, definately an original.... I enjoyed the read, thanks for entering...


  • Matt Holck
    June 16, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    that works '

    guts seems forced


    • Luna Tique Fringe
      June 16, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I don't know...maybe. cuts/Incision/guts ?
      This was my go at this form and I used a quite daunting word bank...There is a second called Chant, much better than this attempt.


  • CrypticAngel
    June 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I really like this piece. Excellent rhyme scheme, and interesting word choice. A true masterpiece.


  • Pure Thought silver member
    June 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Good Solid Gold

    Once in a blue moon could I write something of this technically complex nature.
    Yours flowed so smoothly.
    Well, done,
    Buddy


  • Amera gold member
    May 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is absoultly wonderful! I love it every word fit together kie it was made for the preceeding word.
    Well done!

    Love,
    Amera ♥


    • Luna Tique Fringe
      May 30, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, Sweetie. I'm thinking about calling it Lunacy, the scheme that is. I'm not sure if I could even do it again, lol.


  • sheltered
    May 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Are you saying this is your own created form?


    • Luna Tique Fringe
      May 30, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      As far as I know..I haven't scene it anywhere. The first stanza...just happened. I worked the rest to fit.
      I got to thinking..that's why I used weaken instead of weakening, it's not the best rhyme, close enough, though.
      I think I'll change to name though.

      • sheltered
        May 30, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        You should make a two week contest.
        I'd give it a go.


        • Luna Tique Fringe
          May 30, 2007
          Edit | Reply
          I was just thinking that...I was wondering if it's just a fluke, or something do-able.
          I may call it lunacy, hehe..cause it will drive you crazy..lol


          • polly filla
            May 30, 2007
            Edit | Reply
            heheh. or Lunatunes

            that's all folks


          • sheltered
            May 30, 2007
            Edit | Reply
            It makes me wonder though some day if forms will become redundant because there are so many people coming up with so many different kinds ( present company included) but really it all comes down to the long run and how many are globally accepted... Just a stoned thought... Hehehe


            • Luna Tique Fringe
              May 30, 2007
              Edit | Reply
              Very true...I'm sure...I need to see if I can write another one, eeekkk. Maybe some of the "big guns" lol..might be up for the challenge...let them do the lab experiments, hehe

          • sheltered
            May 30, 2007
            Edit | Reply
            LMAO... I can just imagine.


      • sheltered
        May 30, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        Some how when I first saw it I misread your notes and thought it was someone elses creation...(the form I mean)... very impressive.


  • sheltered
    May 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Actually I think weakening security would be perfect but it's non-relevent cause this is awesome any way I look at it. Thanks.


  • ellipsist
    May 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    you made it

    look easy... wonderful flow... I like this form... =]


  • PerVirtuous
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Nice. What is the significance of the blue moon? I will have to think on that. Excellent, as you know. I give it three bunnies.

    I read it again. Clever. I saw it. Too bad. I still give it three bunnies.


  • polly filla
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    cool. blue moon rising

    I don't know nuthin' about no schemes (except that last statement's bound to be a fallacy), but I do know that the rhythm is pounding

    to the beat of your own drum

    whoop


    • Luna Tique Fringe
      May 29, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks polly..I was actually thinking of naming the form Lunatune..what do you think? I sounds sort of sing-song do you think?


  • HaleyMary
    May 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Awesome. I love the rhyming in this. Seems like quite a challenge. Best of luck in the contest.


  • Ephiphany
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Interesting Rhyme

    I'm new to a lot of things, but from what I have read, Diva Sister...you've done well and I wish you all the Luck in this Contest. Maybe you can teach me to get Deep like that, huh?

    Ephiphany


  • tomisb
    May 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Sounds like my thesis before orals.
    Love, Tom B.

    • Luna Tique Fringe
      May 29, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      Lol, Thanks for the bunnies, hunny


      • tomisb
        May 29, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        You study for two semesters and get it all written then your professor tells you what's stinkin. Your rewrite and try to get it right but you feel like you are in hibernation. Social life another night in the library lights.

        The bunnies are multipling in my house but I won't give them to anyone unless I know it is a good home. So on a dark lonely night when the blues blows through your walls. Give a bunny a hug you won't feel so bad after all. Love,Tom B.


  • Naridill
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This seemed a hard one to pull off but your words, once again are simply captivating and the poem itself flows sweetly like a river.
    I would offer you luck in contest but I doubt you need it


  • Quiet places
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    WOW!

    You penned a real fantastic poem with the rhyme form that kicks butt!! You are a very talented young lady!! I am impressed by this form. I should have known by you other writes that you could pull this off so well. Your pal, Don


  • Griswold silver member
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    WOW, very nicely done Luna, you rhymed the hell out of this one, frontside, backside, your a wonderful poet and you have fun contests too...Scott


  • sheltered
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I really like the beginning line rhyme.
    You don't see that often.
    Deep metaphor here
    The last line jives with me somehow
    I think you could loose the "all"
    This seems like a terribly tough form.
    Excellent job.


  • AliceinPoetryLand gold member
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Yikes! Brilliant. I think my little piece needs scraping! Wonderfully penned, as usual. Such talent!*sigh*

1 - 39 of 39